Posts Tagged: Hazelden Publishing
“Hanging up Clothes and Accidental Happiness”
I grew up before the days when a lot of people had electric or gas-powered dryers to dry their clothes. We used to wash our clothes by hand or in a washing machine, get the water out of them as best we could, and then hang them outside on the line to dry in the sunshine and wind.
I like bounce sheets, but there is nothing like fresh air and sunshine for making clothes smell wonderful. I was reminded of this smell this morning because of a 12-step reading that I did. Here it is:
“Monday, August 22
… sparrow, your message is clear: it is not too late for my singing.
—Tess Gallagher
There was once a mother who loved to hang the laundry out on the clothesline in the backyard. Her baby crawled through the sheets and towels that almost touched the grass. The baby didn’t talk yet, so nobody knew what she was thinking.
Ten years later, the baby, twelve years old, told her that her happiest memory of childhood was playing in her “playhouse” of laundry on the line. She remembered thinking that her mother hung the sheets out there just so she could play in the grass and wind and sun!
How wonderful to be living in a world where we can accidentally make people happy! This knowledge is a miraculous gift, and can give us reason to do every task well and with love, because it may be remembered for a lifetime by someone near to us.
What happy memory do I have of childhood?” (From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
I don’t remember crawling through my mom’s accidental playhouse of drying clothes and sheets, but I do remember walking and running through it. It was a wonderful experience.
Of course, for my mom, doing the laundry was hard work. She was not young (forty-four years old) when I was born. She was a hard-working farm wife. She had arthritis. (I am just beginning to experience that form of mild torture.) I am not sure if I ever told her how much I liked the smell and feel of clothes drying on a clothesline.
I wonder if there are not a lot of things that are hard work or mundane tasks for us that might be bringing accidental happiness to someone. We may not be aware of it. They may or may not notice and thank us. But the crucial thing is that we be, as George MacDonald said, “. . . doers of the work . . . .”
And even God is pleased when we do the mundane things that need to be done. The Apostle Paul discusses at some length whether the Christ-followers in Corinth should eat meat that has been sacrificed to idols. He gives them a lot of good specific counsel, but then he gives them—and us—an overarching principle. “So, whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31, New Living Translation)
When we do even such mundane things as eating and drinking for the glory of God, we give God a lot of not-so-accidental happiness.
“Working with The Gift”
Most real things in life are simple. However, these simple things are almost always inherently complex. Take life, for example. There are lots of verses in the Bible that indicate that life is a gift. There are many others that point out that life is a task. Sometimes, this gift-life combination is spoken in the same breath. Here are two samples.
“See, I have set the land before you. Go in and take possession of the land that the LORD swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give to them and to their offspring after them.’” (Deuteronomy 1:8, English Standard Version) The land was given to Israel, but they still had to go in and possess it.
“Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work forhis good pleasure.” (Philippians 2:12-13, English Standard Version) We are to work out the gift that God has worked into us.
One of my twelve-step readings today was particularly helpful for setting this gift-and-work tone for the day. It is from a book titled Touchstones, published by Hazelden.
“Wednesday, July 27
You cannot get it by taking thought;
You cannot seek it by not taking thought.
—Zenrin poem
We are transported into unfamiliar worlds in this program by ideas that sometimes confound our mind. In the spiritual realms we learn things we didn’t learn anywhere else, and gradually they bring us peace. We can decide with our will to follow a spiritual direction, to turn our life and will over to the care of our God. We cannot control what God will do with them. When we learn that part of our problem was trying too hard, being too self-sufficient, or being too controlling, our old ways tell us to try hard to control that. But then we are only doing more of the same old thing. We learn that after making our decision, our Higher Power takes over. Now it is possible to be released from our own trying, to move beyond our own efforts by falling into the caring hand of God.
I must give this program first priority in my life, remembering my spiritual progress comes as a gift, not as an achievement.” (From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men.)
I was especially struck by the following sentences: “When we learn that part of our problem was trying too hard, being too self-sufficient, or being too controlling, our old ways tell us to try hard to control that. But then we are only doing more of the same old thing.”
Yes! I have often been guilty of trying to control the realization that I am not in control. I am like a dog chasing his own tail. I may be getting exercise, but I’m not really getting anywhere.
Life is hard work. Life is also a gift. When I am lazy and discontented (and discontentment is laziness for me frequently), I need to get busy and do the hard work. But when I get too focused on working hard (and do that occasionally), I need to call to mind the truth that life is a gift.
Don’t chase your own spiritual tail today, dear friends. Instead, fall into the hands of our (and your) loving God. Once you’ve done that, you’re ready to work diligently through the day.
“Still on the Design Board”
“As you look back over your life, it is not too difficult to believe that what you went through was for a purpose, to prepare you for some valuable work in life. Everything in your life may well have been planned by God to make you of some use in the world. Each person’s life is like the pattern of a mosaic. Each thing that happened to you is like one tiny stone in the mosaic, and each tiny stone fits into the perfected pattern of the mosaic of your life, which has been designed by God.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may not need to see the whole design of my life. I pray that I may trust the Designer.” (From Twenty-Four Hours a Day © 1975 by Hazelden Foundation.)
Even though I am sixty-nine-and-a-half, I am still on the drawing board. The Great Designer continues to work on me. He is very creative and very patient.
The problem is that his work on me feels like radical surgery without the benefit of an anesthetic. I am not usually aware of his desires for the final product, but I am keenly aware of the pain.
But of course the pain hasn’t killed me yet. Maybe it won’t.
Sometimes, I get really discouraged when I think of how many years and days I’ve had on this planet and how few years (?) or days (?) I may have left. But then I remember that the Designer who is working on me is eternal himself, and that what he designs is also eternal.
“For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.
Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees,
and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed.” (Hebrews 12:11-13, English Standard Version)
So, I say a very reluctant “Get on with it, LORD! Don’t mind the whining and screaming. You know what you’re doing, even when I don’t.”
“The Big Adventure of Little Things”
One of the things I do on an almost daily basis for my recovery and sanity is a series of brief (free!) readings from Hazelden Publishing. Hazelden is especially focused on recovery from addiction, but many of their writings simply help people to live sane and mostly happy lives. In other words, these readings are good for just about anyone. Here is a reading for today:
“Saturday, June 20
The most valuable thing we can do for the psyche, occasionally, is to let it rest, wander, live in the changing light of a room, not to try to do or be anything whatsoever.
—May Sarton
A whole world can be seen through even the smallest window. Knowing this can help us slow down and enjoy everyday events. We can listen to the regular rhythms of letter carriers and school children, dogs and delivery trucks, city buses and song birds playing out a piece of their daily lives outside the window.
We can greet the letter carrier who comes up the walk, feed the robin who lands on the sill, wave to the kids who’ve found a shortcut through our backyards on their way home from school.
It is not necessary, today, for us to fill our lives with important meetings, gala parties, expensive treats, toys, or outings to be happy. There is a whole world to be discovered just outside the nearest window.
What worlds lie on the other side of my window today?” (From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
I think we all want to do, to have, and to experience big things. But maybe what we really need to do is to go small. Perhaps there is enough adventure in the small things for us to savor.
I am getting better at this. I used to be restless most of the time, waiting for some big thing to happen. Not so much anymore. I like looking out the window at the trees, laughing with my wife, enjoying a slow cup of coffee. I am learning that little things can be a huge delight.
One of my favorite verses is a little-known verse in a little-known book. “For whoever has despised the day of small things shall rejoice . . . .” (Zechariah 4:10, King James Version) The context of this verse is that the exiles from Judah had been allowed to return to Jerusalem. They were rebuilding the temple, with the encouragement of the prophets Haggai and Zechariah. But this temple would not be nearly as grand or big or ornate as the temple that Solomon had constructed. However, the prophets asked a question that was also a rebuke and a challenge: Are you despising the day of small things? Don’t!
Joyce Baldwin, in her excellent commentary on Zechariah for the Tyndale Old Testament Commentary Series notes, “Zechariah, like Haggai, implies that the ‘realists’ were pessimistic about the building project (Hag. 2:3), and so despised the day of small things. They wanted to see it succeed and were glad when it did, but their faith was too small. They would be surprised into rejoicing.”
Surprised into rejoicing! Yes!
“A Recipe for Stone Soup”
Here is one of my twelve-step readings for today. Since I am trying to learn to cook, I liked this recipe a lot. It is simple.
“Wednesday, June 3
Men will find that they can prepare with mutual aid far more easily what they need and avoid far more easily the perils which beset them on all sides, by united forces.
—Baruch Spinoza
Three travelers stopped in a small town on their way to the city. They had tents to sleep in, but no food or money. They knocked on doors asking for a little food, but the people were poor, with little to eat and nothing to spare.
Cheerfully, they returned to their camp and built a fire. “What are you doing?” asked a bystander, “Building a fire with nothing to cook?”
“But we do have something to cook!” they said. “Our favorite dish, stone soup. We only need a pot.”
“I think I can find one,” said one of the bystanders, and she ran home to fetch it.
When she returned, the travelers filled the pot with water and placed two large stones in it. “This will be the finest soup we’ve ever made!” said the first traveler. “I agree,” said the second, “but don’t you think it would taste better with a cabbage in it?”
“I think I can find one,” said another bystander. And so it went the whole afternoon until, by evening, the travelers had a hearty, fragrant feast, which they shared with the hungry townspeople.
What can I do with help today, that I couldn’t do alone?” (From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
There isn’t much I can add to this. I think I’ll go build a fire!
(You can purchase this book from Hazelden Publishing. Hazelden publishes lots of good things. While not overtly Christian or even religious, they are often very helpful, even if you’re not an addict.)
“The Hardest Someone to Forgive”
Here is part of a 12-step reading from Hazelden Publishing:
“Forgiveness should be an ongoing process. Attention to it
daily will ease our relationships with others and encourage greater self-love.
First on our list for forgiveness should be ourselves. Daily, we heap
recriminations upon ourselves. And our lack of self-love hinders our ability to
love others, which in turn affects our treatment of them. We’ve come full
circle – and forgiveness is in order. It can free us. It will change our
perceptions of life’s events, and it promises greater happiness.
The forgiving heart is magical. My whole life will undergo a dynamic change
when I develop a forgiving heart.” (From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for
Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
I was especially struck by the words, “First on our list for forgiveness should be ourselves. Daily, we heap recriminations upon ourselves. And our lack of self-love hinders our ability to love others, which in turn affects our treatment of them.”
I struggle with forgiving the man that I was. I did so many stupid, harmful things to myself and many others. The fallout from those decisions haunts me and others to this very day. I will go to my grave grieving over these things.
Or will I? Grieving is good, if it leads to real repentance and a better, kinder way of living. But grief is not good, in and of itself. I am not the man I used to be, no matter what I or anyone else thinks about the matter.
But I still struggle with self-forgiveness. Partly, this may be caused by the fact that I don’t see self-forgiveness taught in the Bible. Yes, God forgives. Sometimes, other people forgive. I am to forgive others. Yes, yes, and yes. But where in the Bible does it say anything about self-forgiveness?
The problem with asking hard questions is that sometimes you get even harder answers. This was the case when I asked the question about biblical self-forgiveness.
A verse came to mind. “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you (Colossians 3:13 | NIV).
I suspect that I am a someone. I suspect that we are all someones.
“Invincible Summer”
“In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” (Albert Camus)
This was the epigraph that led off one of my 12-step readings this morning. I am profoundly grateful to Hazelden Publishing for these readings. They help make me saner—or, at least, a little less crazy.
I have been prone to depression for nearly sixty years. It started just before Christmas when I was nine years old. I didn’t even know what to call it then. I have since come to know the grey monster only too well.
Especially in winter, it is a problem. Some forty years ago, my wife noticed, one dreary February day, that I was more prone to depression in the winter. In her usual constructive manner, she said, “You need to get some exercise. Perhaps that would help.”
“It’s 270!” I replied. I thought that would cool her jets. It didn’t. She’s pesky like that.
“Why don’t we go play golf?” she continued. “You’ve been wanting to teach me how to play.”
“It’s 270!” I said again, as if she hadn’t heard the first time.
“We’ll bundle up,” she said.
Knowing my wife’s persistence (and being too depressed to resist much of anything), we bundled up, got someone to watch our kids, threw my clubs in our refrigerated car, and headed for the golf course.
After five holes of icy golf, I was feeling much colder, but a lot less depressed. “I think I’m feeling better,” I said, through chattering teeth. And then, I added, “You really did well for this being your first golf outing ever.”
“I would have done even better if I had had left-handed clubs,” she replied. I am a righty, and my wife is a lefty. She really did do well!
I have a lot to be depressed about right now. No need to go into all the details. It would make me even more depressed if I did. It probably wouldn’t do a lot to lift your spirits either.
But now, along comes Camus, who is not known for his optimism, with this quote: “In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.”
Invincible summer! Now there’s an incantation with which to conjure. I can certainly remember summer, even in winter. And I can play summer songs on You Tube. I can probably even create a “summer channel” on AccuRadio.
And maybe, just maybe, I can come to enjoy winter more, too.
After a long, grey, wintry spell, the day is dawning cold, but bright and clear. Today, I will choose joy. Today, I will choose to be invincible summer.
“Giving Thanks for Ordinary Goods”
Here is a wonderful 12-step reading for today. Enjoy! Hazelden Publishing sells some very helpful devotional materials for people in recovery. Some are overtly Christian. Most are not. All are helpful.
“
Thursday, November 28
for most this amazing day . . .
. . . for everything
which is natural which is infinite
which is yes.
—e. e. cummings
Let us be thankful today for all simple obvious things: for the sun’s rising this morning without our having to awaken it; for another good turn the earth makes today without expecting anything in return; for our ability to know right and wrong by heart. Let us give thanks for all small things that mean the world to us; for bread and cheese and clean running water; for our ability to call our enemies our friends, to forgive even ourselves; for our own bodies, however sagging and worn, which insist on continuing for at least another day.
How much ordinary daily good do I take for granted?” (From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
DOWN TO EARTH BELIEVER
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- “The Power of Encouragement—Even for Old People” March 10, 2024“But encourage each other every day while it is ‘today.’ Help each other so none of you will become hardened because sin has tricked you.” (Hebrews 3:13, New Century Version) Yesterday, I was walking at a nearby park. There was a large group of young people some of whom were running while other young people […]
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- “Delighting in Being Told What to Do?!?” February 23, 2024“Psa. 112:1 Praise the LORD! Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, who greatly delights in his commandments! 2 His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. 3 Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures […]
- “Character is the Real Lesson” January 19, 2024I am often confused about what lesson I’m really supposed to be learning. For example, this morning I was trying to knock out several Spanish lessons. My intentions were a lot better than my internet connection. I’ve done three lessons. Or rather, I’ve done two lessons. One of them I did twice because the internet […]
- “The Year of Becoming Un-Planked” January 1, 2024Each year, I try to come up with one word or a short phrase for what I intend to work on in the upcoming year. 2024 is “The Year of Becoming Un-Planked”. What?!! What does that even mean? So glad that you asked! Jesus said to his disciples, “Why do you look at the speck […]
- “Searching for the Noble One” December 26, 2023My wife and I were reading Luke, chapter 2 on Christmas Day. Luke 2 talks about the shepherds being told to look for this very special child—in fact, this King—in a stable. I prefer the word “barn”. I grew up on a farm. I know what a barn is. A stable is entirely too biblical […]
- “That Don’t Impress God Much” December 14, 2023DTEB, “That Don’t Impress God Much” “That Don’t Impress Me Much” (Song by Robert John Lange and Shania Twain) Micah 6:8 (MSG) “But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be […]
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