Monthly Archives: February 2021
“The Prayer of a Man Too Busy for Gratitude Lists”
God, is it important for me to actually write down my items of gratitude? Couldn’t I just be grateful? I’m busy! There are so many things I want to do! And some, I really ought to do. I could save time by skipping the list.
But here is the problem as I see it: I think the lists keep me alert during the day for things that invite gratitude. And I definitely need to be aware of the things that make for gratitude. Otherwise, I just become a more selfish, gloomy, despairing person. And I already have way more of those qualities (especially the selfishness) than I need.
So, I guess I know the answer. Don’t like it, but I know it.
GRATITUDE LIST:
- Gratitude lists.
- The ability to do healthy things that I don’t want to do.
- . . .
“The Rule of 15”
I have decided that from here on out, I am going to live by the Rule of 15.
What on earth is “the Rule of 15,” you ask? The Rule of 15 states that, whenever I am about to say or do anything, I keep in mind the Rule of 15. The rule asks me how I’m going to feel about this word or action in 15 seconds, 15 hours, 15, days, or 15 years. I don’t have to go through every permutation of these time increments. In fact, 15 seconds is usually enough.
Now, I can hear your mental wheels turning. You’re thinking to yourself, “He’s not going to be able to ask that question? There isn’t time. He won’t be able to say or do anything!”
And I would respond with two counterpoints. First, would it really be such a bad thing if I said and did less? When all is said and done, I say and do a lot of downright stupidities.
Second, I spend a lot more time than 15 seconds, 15, hours, and 15 days regretting things I’ve done in the past. And yes, as a matter of fact, some of my decisions have haunted me for a lot longer than even 15 years. So, a simple cost-benefits analysis would suggest that the Rule of 15 is a good way of budgeting my time and my life.
And the reason for the Rule of 15 is simple: Immediate gratification is not really so gratifying. “Trust your feelings!” is the mantra of many of us modern folks. And it is a good mantra—provided. (You knew there would be fine print, didn’t you? There’s always fine print.) Trusting my feelings is fine, provided that I trust my longer-term feelings. The main thing is to ask myself how I’ll feel in 15.
One final thought. My own belief, shared with many others, is that I will live forever. I can’t wrap my mind around that, but I do believe it. If my decisions in the here and now are decisions that I will need to live with forever, suddenly the Rule of 15—even 15 years—becomes a pretty minimalistic requirement.
Now, if you are like me, you’ve made a lot of bad decisions over the years. You’ve said and done lots of things that you would love to unsay or undo. But, of course, we can’t, can we? And we’ve also failed to do the right things. The Rule of 15 sounds like a heavy burden, doesn’t it?
Oh, do I have some good news for you and me and for the entire world! In 15 seconds or less, all of your sins can be forgiven. How do I know this? Because it has happened to me.
One time, when my past was up in my face taunting me, I asked God what his pet name for me is. The problem with asking God a question is that he may actually answer you. I don’t listen well to my friends, my wife, my better angels, or even God, but every once in a while, I am so desperate that I muster all my courage and take the plunge. I don’t feel that I very often hear the voice of God, but this time, I think I did. God’s pet name for me is . . .
. . . Forgiven.
I don’t have an exclusive copyright on that name. It can be your name too.
“A String of Behavioral Beeds”
No, the word “Beeds” in the title is not a misspelling. It is a wonderful new word that a friend of mine coined.
He and I are part of a threesome who help one another with growth and accountability. We are always seeking ways in which we can grow and become better men.
My friend was trying to find an English word for “the smallest meaningful unit of behavior” and couldn’t. So, he invented the word “beed”. It is a blend word, also known as a portmanteau word. (Think of “smog”, which combines “smoke” with “fog”.)
The word “beed” combines the words “behavior” and “deed”. Beeds are not big, hairy audacious goals, or even dramatic deeds. Beeds are the atoms of behavioral molecules.
Too often, we are rather dismissive of small things. However, that is like being dismissive of atoms, which are the building blocks of the entire created universe.
To do small, but good things, is to participate in the creation of the universe. It is to live out our humanity as the images of God.
Jesus said that even giving a cup of cold water or visiting someone who was sick or in prison was important and would receive a glorious reward. Jesus was apparently into beeds.
So, let me ask you an important question: What needs can you create and string together today?
As I was writing this post, I got word that my mother-in-law just passed away. It was a long and bitter battle for her. I loved my mother-in-law. Still do.
Several of my friends have picked up the phone when I’ve called. When they couldn’t, they soon called me back. Picking up a phone a very small beed, but it just goes to show you how important and meaningful even a small beed can be.
Let’s all string some beeds today. What do you say?
“Advice vs. Guidance”
Before I threw the covers off this morning, I prayed that God would guide me through and throughout this day. My 12-step affirmation for today is “Today, I am allowing my Higher Power to guide me to make good choices and to follow through on those choices.”
Then, strangely enough, in one of my 12-step readings, I encountered a section entitled “Divinely Led.” It began with an epigraph, which is also a prayer:
“Send me the right thought, word, or action. Show me what my next step should be. In times of doubt and indecision please send your inspiration and guidance.
—Alcoholics Anonymous” (https://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/thought-for-the-day?book=2&date=2021-02-11)
It is so much easier to give advice than guidance. An advisor points out the direction you should go. A guide goes with you.
According to both the Old and New Testaments, God is not an advisor. God is a guide. Of course, God is not just a guide. God is many things. But God isa guide.
I really appreciate that sometimes. I can get lost in my own close closet—and it isn’t even a walk-in closet. For sure, I can get lost in my own mind. As someone has said, “The mind is a dark and scary place. Don’t go there alone!”
My Guide often accompanies me to places I don’t want to go, but my Guide goes with me. And when I follow and arrive at this place I did not want to go, there is a delightful view or a needful lesson to be learned—sometimes a view and a lesson.
God guides me in many ways: through the Bible, for sure, but in other ways as well. Here is a very partial list of ways in which my Guide guides:
- The Bible.
- Other books and articles, both sacred and secular.
- Music.
- Friends.
- 12-step readings.
- Internal nudging from the Holy Spirit.
- My dog.
- My circumstances.
- Trial and error.
- My own internal longings. (Well, some of them.)
Who’s to say? Perhaps God even guides through blog posts like this one. May you be guided through this day!
“A Warning against Gangs and Other Forms of Greedy Gangster Activities”
Gangs come in various sizes and flavors. So does greed.
Take Proverbs 1:10-19 for example. Yes, they were around in ancient times as well! Did you really think that gangs were a modern phenomenon?
“Prov. 1:10 My son, if sinners entice you,
do not consent.
Prov. 1:11 If they say, “Come with us, let us lie in wait for blood;
let us ambush the innocent without reason;
Prov. 1:12 like Sheol let us swallow them alive,
and whole, like those who go down to the pit;
Prov. 1:13 we shall find all precious goods,
we shall fill our houses with plunder;
Prov. 1:14 throw in your lot among us;
we will all have one purse”—
Prov. 1:15 my son, do not walk in the way with them;
hold back your foot from their paths,
Prov. 1:16 for their feet run to evil,
and they make haste to shed blood.
Prov. 1:17 For in vain is a net spread
in the sight of any bird,
Prov. 1:18 but these men lie in wait for their own blood;
they set an ambush for their own lives.
Prov. 1:19 Such are the ways of everyone who is greedy for unjust gain;
it takes away the life of its possessors.”
The enticements of a gang are many. Love of violence (and control?) for its own sake, easy money, and being “one of the gang”—literally—all play their part. But in verses 18 and 19, the father-teacher points out something that the gang does not tell its recruits: Evil and violence are self-defeating. Indeed, evil and violence are not so much a quick way to easy money, as they are a quick way to an early grave.
But notice how verse 19 is not content to simply point out the danger of gangs. “Such are the ways of everyone who is greedy for unjust gain; it takes away the life of its possessors” (italics mine). This broadens the warning to include more than the danger of gangs.
The same Hebrew word that is used for “unjust gain” in 1:19 is used in connection with the taking of bribes in Prov. 15:27
“Whoever is greedy for unjust gain troubles his own household,
but he who hates bribes will live.” (English Standard Version)
Notice the word “whoever” in this verse. This proverb is not just talking about the danger of gangs for a young person. It is generalized to involve anyone who takes a bribe.
Similarly, Proverbs 28:16 speaks of the danger of a ruler taking a unjust gain:
“A ruler who lacks understanding is a cruel oppressor,
but he who hates unjust gain will prolong his days.”
Apparently, those in positions of political authority were especially prone to shorten their days, their very lives, with unjust gain. Imagine that! Political corruption and cruelty! I’m certainly glad that we don’t have that these days! (Yes, you’re right: I am being ironic, if not sarcastic.)
But lest we too quickly let our own selves off the unjust gain hook, perhaps we should think more deeply about the danger. Let me personalize the matter by asking myself some uncomfortable questions.
In what way might I be profiting by the cruelty of others? Have I ever bothered to examine my investment portfolios to see specifically the investments that my Edward Jones folks are doing on my behalf? Am I as innocent in these matters as I would like to believe? The question answers itself. And frankly, I don’t like the answer.
And what about taking credit for things I don’t do? Or, at least, for things that I don’t do alone? I don’t intentionally plagiarize, but I do sometimes “accidentally” forget my source. Is it really so accidental?
What about hogging all the attention? I’ve always struggled with that. Still do. All people need some positive, concentrated attention if they to thrive. By always wanting to be in the limelight myself, do I shade out other people and stunt their growth? Such an attitude is not so different from what Proverbs 1:19 warns us against. Even a small gang of Me, Myself, and I is quite deadly. Self-preoccupation not only harms others. It is also toxic to me.
So how do I avoid becoming part of a gang or being a gang? I need to keep in mind constantly the dangers involved. And I need to remember that God doesn’t have a gang; he has a family, of which I claim to be a part. And isn’t that enough, really? I am not the center of attention and I don’t need to be. Loving God and loving people may not lead to easy money, but it does lead to a life that is well-lived and profoundly satisfying.
“God’s Law is . . . Positively Delightful?!?”
In yesterday’s post, I commented on Psalm 1:1. I pointed out that being happy, at least in part, involves avoiding things that sabotage our own happiness. Those are the same things that sabotages the happiness of others. My point was so simple that I often miss it: Happiness involves not doing certain things. Perhaps you also occasionally struggle with the negative, “not-doing” part of happiness.
Today, I want to deal with the positive pole of the happiness battery charger—what we can do to be happy. I have copied and pasted the entire psalm below for your perusal. Don’t worry: It is not a long psalm!
“Psa. 1:1 Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
2 but his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.
Psa. 1:3 He is like a tree
planted by streams of water
that yields its fruit in its season,
and its leaf does not wither.
In all that he does, he prospers.
4 The wicked are not so,
but are like chaff that the wind drives away.
Psa. 1:5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous;
6 for the LORD knows the way of the righteous,
but the way of the wicked will perish.” (Psalm 1, English Standard Version)
As was the case yesterday with verse 1, I quote Derek Kidner on verse 2:
“The three negatives have cleared the way for what is positive, which is their true function and the value of their hard cutting edge. (Even in Eden God gave man a negative, to allow him the privilege of decisive choice.) The mind was the first bastion to defend, in verse 1, and is treated as the key to the whole man. The law of the Lord stands opposed to ‘the counsel of the wicked’ (1), to which it is ultimately the only answer. The psalm is content to develop this one theme, implying that whatever really shapes a man’s thinking shapes his life. This is conveniently illustrated also by the next psalm, where the word for ‘plot’ (2:1b) is the same as for meditates here, with results that follow from the very different thoughts that are entertained there. In our verse, the deliberate echo of the charge to Joshua reminds the man of action that the call to think hard about the will of God is not merely for the recluse, but is the secret of [Vol 15: Psa, p. 65] achieving anything worthwhile (cf. prospers, here, with Josh. 1:8). Law (tôrâ) basically means ‘direction’ or ‘instruction’; it can be confined to a single command, or can extend, as here, to Scripture as a whole.
3. . . . The phrase its fruit in its season emphasizes both the distinctiveness and the quiet growth of the product; for the tree is no mere channel, piping the water unchanged from one place to another, but a living organism which absorbs it, to produce in due course something new and delightful, proper to its kind and to its time. The promised immunity of the leaf from withering is not independence of the rhythm of the seasons (cf. the preceding line, and see on 31:15), but freedom from the crippling damage of drought (cf. Jer. 17:8b).”
So, the law—or better, the instruction—of the LORD aims at our ultimate stability, productiveness, and happiness. Now that is positivity on steroids!
I have noticed that, sometimes, when I marinate in God’s Instruction, I experience this delightful happiness. Not always, perhaps not even often. But when I do experience this delight in God’s Instruction, it is very delightful indeed.
And when I don’t experience such delight, I eventually (and grudgingly) have to admit that the fault is in me. God’s Law—God’s Instruction—is positive in its ultimate intentions. The really damaging (and damning) negativity is within my own mind and heart.
“Blessed Negativity”
“Psa. 1:1 Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
2 but his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.
Psa. 1:3 He is like a tree
planted by streams of water
that yields its fruit in its season,
and its leaf does not wither.
In all that he does, he prospers.
4 The wicked are not so,
but are like chaff that the wind drives away.
Psa. 1:5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous;
6 for the LORD knows the way of the righteous,
but the way of the wicked will perish.” (Psalm 1, English Standard Version)
Positivity is a magic word these days. I get that, and frankly, I pretty much agree. However, let me come in with a good word in favor of negativity.
Take, for example, Psalm 1. This psalm starts out positively, by using the word “blessed.”
What does it mean to be blessed? Some translations use the word “happy” to translate the Hebrew word “ʾašrē”, which is not a bad guess. (“Bliss” has also been suggested, but most of us don’t much about bliss, except for some of us who are who recognize Bliss as the name of a coffee.) The Hebrew word contains the idea that someone has to do something. Happiness doesn’t zap anybody. It is a participant sport.
According to the Old Testament, often what a person needs to do in order to experience happiness is positive. There are things we need to do consistently in order to experience happiness. However, sometimes happiness is negative—something or some things that need to be avoided. Verse 1 of Psalm 1 points out this somewhat unwelcome fact.
“Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers.”
Derek Kidner makes some fine comments on the negative aspects of happiness in his commentary on Psalms. After commenting on the word “blessed”, Kidner writes, “This psalm goes on to show the sober choice that is its basis [that is, the basis of blessedness]. The Sermon on the Mount, using the corresponding word in Greek, will go on to expound it still more radically.
Counsel, way and seat (or ‘assembly’, or ‘dwelling’) draw attention to the realms of thinking, behaving and belonging, in which a person’s fundamental choice of allegiance is made and carried through; and this is borne out by a hint of decisiveness in the tense of the Hebrew verbs (the perfect). It would be reading too much into these verbs to draw a moral from the apparent process of slowing down from walking to sitting, since the journey was in the wrong direction for a start. Yet certainly the three complete phrases show three aspects, indeed three degrees, of departure from God, by portraying conformity to this world at three different levels: accepting its advice, being party to its ways, and adopting the most fatal of its attitudes – for the scoffers, if not the most scandalous of sinners, are the farthest from repentance (Prov. 3:34).”
So, there are some things to avoid, if we really want to be happy. And really, we all know this. This psalm is not saying anything out of the ordinary. If we want to be happy, we need to avoid things that make us unhappy. This is not rocket science or advanced psychology. Instead, this is life 101. In this sense, blessedness is a negative thing, and negativity is a blessed thing.
May you be blessedly negative today! (And may you come back to read tomorrow’s post, which will speak of delightful positivity!)
DOWN TO EARTH BELIEVER
- “Even a Sliver of Light” April 9, 2024“For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.” (2 Corinthians 5:6, English Standard Version) I missed the total eclipse yesterday. There were a number of good reasons for this, but […]
- “The Process in Miracles and the Miracle of Process” March 11, 2024“2 Kings 5:1 Naaman, commander of the army of the king of Syria, was a great man with his master and in high favor, because by him the LORD had given victory to Syria. He was a mighty man of valor, but he was a leper. 2 Now the Syrians on one of their raids […]
- “The Power of Encouragement—Even for Old People” March 10, 2024“But encourage each other every day while it is ‘today.’ Help each other so none of you will become hardened because sin has tricked you.” (Hebrews 3:13, New Century Version) Yesterday, I was walking at a nearby park. There was a large group of young people some of whom were running while other young people […]
- “Endurance” March 10, 2024“For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.” (Hebrews 10:36, English Standard Version) “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us […]
- “The Limits of Non-Judgmentalism” February 24, 2024“Matt. 7:1 “Judge not, that you be not judged. Matt. 7:2 For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.” (Matthew 7:1-2, English Standard Version) This morning, in my virtual 12-step meeting, we discussed the topic of judgmentalism. There were many wise […]
- “Delighting in Being Told What to Do?!?” February 23, 2024“Psa. 112:1 Praise the LORD! Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, who greatly delights in his commandments! 2 His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. 3 Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures […]
- “Character is the Real Lesson” January 19, 2024I am often confused about what lesson I’m really supposed to be learning. For example, this morning I was trying to knock out several Spanish lessons. My intentions were a lot better than my internet connection. I’ve done three lessons. Or rather, I’ve done two lessons. One of them I did twice because the internet […]
- “The Year of Becoming Un-Planked” January 1, 2024Each year, I try to come up with one word or a short phrase for what I intend to work on in the upcoming year. 2024 is “The Year of Becoming Un-Planked”. What?!! What does that even mean? So glad that you asked! Jesus said to his disciples, “Why do you look at the speck […]
- “Searching for the Noble One” December 26, 2023My wife and I were reading Luke, chapter 2 on Christmas Day. Luke 2 talks about the shepherds being told to look for this very special child—in fact, this King—in a stable. I prefer the word “barn”. I grew up on a farm. I know what a barn is. A stable is entirely too biblical […]
- “That Don’t Impress God Much” December 14, 2023DTEB, “That Don’t Impress God Much” “That Don’t Impress Me Much” (Song by Robert John Lange and Shania Twain) Micah 6:8 (MSG) “But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be […]
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