Monthly Archives: April 2017
“My To-Do Lists and God’s Priorities”
Sometimes, I confuse my to-do list with what should be my priorities.
Take this morning, for example. My affirmation to my sponsor (as well as to myself and God) was as follows:
“Today, by God’s grace, I will spread mulch, do some (hopefully) creative writing, and work at Bob Evans. I will do these things because they are fun to do, because they need doing, because they may benefit other people, and because they will glorify God when they are done in the right way with the right attitude.” (Down to Earth Believer, affirmation sent to 12-step sponsor.”)
But then, I turned to a daily retreat sponsored by the Jesuits and Loyola Press, and read the following reflections on 1 Corinthians 13:13, which says “So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”
“This scripture passage offers us a chance to reflect on our priorities. It tells us that, at the end of the day, it won’t be the school we graduated from, our annual income, or our zip code that matters. Rather, we will be judged by our fidelity to God, our hope in Christ and the power of his Resurrection, and the love that we show ourselves and our neighbor. It’s as simple as that.” (Excerpt from the “3-Minute Retreat” for today, April 27, 2017, http://www.loyolapress.com/retreats/love-lasts-forever-start-retreat.)
This invited me to do a little probing of my to-do list. Here is the question: Do my priorities match up with and reflect God’s priorities for all believers? In other words, am I going to choose to spread mulch in a loving, hopeful, faith-filled way?
This is one of those questions that I can’t always answer, and don’t want to answer. I don’t always like other people’s answers to my questions. I often flat-out detest my own answers.
My answer will not come in the form of this post. It will not come primarily in terms of my feelings or thoughts. My answer will come as I put each shovelful of mulch in the wheel barrow and spread it around our flower beds.
Ultimately, only God can decide how lovingly, how hopefully, how faithfully I mulched the flower beds. But I can at least live with the question.
Postscript: I wrote this blog yesterday, so that I could post it early this morning. I got the mulching pretty well done. I’m going to the chiropractor this morning.
“Overcoming ______________ (fill in the blank): Breaking the Wizard’s Wand”
Years ago, a Bible study group that I led was discussing how we tend to let other people define us. This is especially the case when we are little. In particular, parents, siblings, school classmates, teachers, and coaches have a huge influence on us.
One of the members of the study group used the analogy of a wizard. Wizards have wands, with which they can wield a lot of power for good or for ill. When we are little, we don’t have much (if any) choice about who has power over us.
However, as we mature, we ourselves actually are the ones who give people their wands, although we may not realize that we’ve given them power over us.
Then, this member of the group went on to say something I’ll never forget: “When we are adults, we have the right to demand that a wand be returned to us, if the wizard hasn’t used the wand for our good.”
So, here is what I sometimes do: I visualize a certain person to whom I have given a wand. If I do not like the way in which they are practicing their wizardry, I visualize myself saying to them, “I need the wand that I gave you back.”
Then, I visualize myself breaking the wand over my knee.
A friend of mine (who is so insightful that he should be doing his own blog) said to me this morning, “Resentment gives other people a lot of control over us.” Indeed it does! Perhaps it would be helpful if I broke a wand named “resentment” over my knee. Resentment is a wand that places me under an evil spell in a hurry.
Above all, as I have said in an earlier blog, I tend to resent myself. I make a lousy wizard for anyone else. But I’m not good at being a wizard to myself, either. Paul said that he didn’t want the Corinthians judging others, and that he himself did not judge even himself (1 Corinthians 4:3). Perhaps if I stopped judging myself, I would stop having so many resentments against myself.
However, no matter what you want to overcome, whether it is resentment or something else, it may be time that you broke some wizards’ wands. That is why this post is entitled “Overcoming ____________.” You fill in the blank. Whatever evil spell you are under, you have the right to break the wizard’s wand. Indeed, you have not only the right; indeed, you have the responsibility to do so.
And then there is God. God is not a wizard. God does not wield a wand. Rather, God is a loving heavenly Father, who wants all of us to be free. I believe that God will help you to identify the evil, controlling wizards in your life. If you aren’t strong enough to break their wands, rest assured that God is able to do so.
“Preferences Become Cages”
I have a friend with whom I frequently talk on the phone. I find him to be a wonderful blend of kind and insightful.
I mentioned to him this morning that I am trying to get over my preferences. Could he pray for me about that? He said something that I immediately thought was profoundly true: “Preferences become cages.”
Yes!
I have noticed that when I get what I want, I am not necessarily happy. Come to think of it, I’m not sure I remember ever getting what I wanted, and being tremendously happy with it. Of course, I may just be getting old and forgetful. However, I doubt it.
But what’s wrong with having preferences, you ask? Probably, not much.
It’s just that, when I have preferences, pretty soon, the preferences have me. Any time that any material or emotional or relational thing possesses me, I’m possessed. And possession (demonic or otherwise) is not good.
Also, when I have preferences, they come prepackaged with resentment. The resentment may not kick in right away. It may lie dormant for years. But then, at some point, I don’t get my preferences, and the resentment becomes active.
Furthermore, preferences keep me from the happiness of surprise. One of the reasons very small children enjoy playing peek-a-boo may be that they have not yet developed preferences about when they will see you. (Some folks, by the time they are teenagers, prefer not to see their parents at all.) Whether preferences are met or not, the happiness of surprise evaporates.
Finally, preferences keep me from making new friends, learning new things, experiencing the moment in an open-minded way. Preferences turn me into a prisoner of my own expectations.
On second thought, maybe there is a lot that is wrong with preferences.
I don’t know what hell is like, and would rather not find out, thank you! However, I wonder if it isn’t a place where we are imprisoned with our increasingly precise preferences.
Stay out of hell! Okay? I’ll try to stay out of it as well.
“Sunsets, Ontology, and What Impresses Young Children”
We had a young couple and their family over for dinner last evening. There were two boys, about six and four, along with a baby girl. The ground was too soggy for the boys to play out in the yard much, so they played games inside. They wanted to see what was upstairs, but mom and dad put the kibosh on that. Just before they left, however, my wife escorted them upstairs for a look around. They were quite impressed.
What impressed them most were the whirlpool (which doesn’t work) and my window on the west. It had been a very grey day, but just as my wife was taking the boys on the tour, the setting sun broke through, and streamed through the red curtain at my window. The boys were quite taken with the sunset through my red curtain!
That may be, in part, because children are into ontology. Don’t be frightened by that word, even if you’re not a philosopher. Ontology simply means “the systematic study of the ‘is-ness’ of things—that is, of their essence or being.
Well, maybe it isn’t that simple after all. If a person is studying essence, perhaps—at that very moment, and by that very action—the person is missing the essence. The boys were not studying the sunset through my red curtain. Rather, they were experiencing that sunset.
Madeleine L’Engle, A Circle of Quiet, observes that ontology is being completely outside oneself, and that small children are perhaps one of the best examples of ontology. “In real play, which is real concentration, the child is not only outside time, he is outside himself. He has thrown himself completely into whatever it is that he is doing.”
I am entirely too self-involved to be into ontology most of the time. However, I think I’m getting a little better. As I write this, an achingly lovely day is dawning. New leaves on the trees are swaying. I hear my wife downstairs, running water in the shower. Lovely sounds.
The word for today is ontology.
“Resentment: Creeping Charlie of the Heart: Overcoming Resentment, Part 2”
My post yesterday dealt with resentment and how to overcome it. However, I am discovering just how deep the roots go, and how wide this obnoxious plant called “resentment” goes in me. Resentment relates to my emotional state very much like creeping charlie relates to my yard. Resentment stays low, spreads rapidly from the roots, and chokes out everything but itself.
For example, . . .
Last night, I was waiting tables at Frisch’s. We weren’t very busy, so I was cut from the servers’ map early. No problem there: Get your side work done, and go home to your sweetheart, I said to myself!
However, we got a slight late “hit” of customers. I was rolling silverware, the last thing I had to do before I clocked out.
Two gentlemen were standing, waiting to be seated. I kept thinking to myself that someone should greet and seat them. Of course, I was someone. However, I said to myself that someone else who was still on the servers’ map could seat them. The guys eventually walked out. I felt bad, but it was only later that I realized that this was yet another manifestation of resentment. I resented being cut early, resented helping my fellow-servers make some more money for themselves. I was wrong. No excuse.
I read a brief, but helpful, article about resentment. It had a wonderful quote. Here it is, along with a link to the whole article.
“Resentment is the cheapest and least legitimate form of anger. It is all emotion and no strength” (https://www.gotquestions.org/Bible-resentment.html, accessed 04-21-2017. The entire article is short and helpful.).
Here are a few other quotable quotes that I found helpful in fostering and focusing my desire to overcome resentment. They are all from this very fine internet site: http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/resentment, accessed 04-21-2017.
“As smoking is to the lungs, so is resentment to the soul; even one puff is bad for you.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert
“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”
― Carrie Fisher
“They all laughed when I said I’d become a comedian. Well, they’re not laughing now.”
― Bob Monkhouse, Crying With Laughter: My Life Story
“With each opportunity before me, God presented me with a choice. I could accept His offerings, His wisdom, His grace. Or I could choose to hold onto the pain, the anger and the resentment a little longer.”
― Sharon E. Rainey, Making a Pearl from the Grit of Life
“At the heart of all anger, all grudges, and all resentment, you’ll always find a fear that hopes to stay anonymous.”
― Donald L. Hicks, Look into the stillness
Well, that is enough for now. There’s a lot more wisdom in those quotes than I’ve lived out. And foolishness is wisdom that is not being lived out. (I think that’s original, so it probably isn’t.)
What sayings or methods have proven helpful to you in your own personal battle against resentment?
Overcoming Resentment, Part 1
I’ve been struggling with resentment here of late. I’ve been especially resentful toward my own past self, but resentment is like a raging river: it doesn’t respect any banks. When I allow resentment to build, even resentment toward myself, it will soon be resentment toward everyone and everything.
So, I did what all modern, spiritual people do: I googled resentment! I typed the question, “What is resentment, and what is wrong with it?”
My first hit was a strike-out. The title (10 Steps to Letting Go of Resentment | Psychology Today) sounded good, but when I went to https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-therapist-is-in/201103/10-steps-letting-go-resentment, I was informed of the following:
“Access Denied
You are not authorized to access this page.”
I was starting to feel resentment toward Psychology Today, when I realized that, perhaps this was simply indicating that I really did need some help. I decided to go to another site. I’m glad that I did!
I am unabashed Christian, but I go to many sources for help, including to Buddhists. I just discovered a helpful site: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/4-powerful-tips-to-reduce-resentment-and-feel-happier/, (accessed 04-20-2017). The rest of this blog will make more sense if you follow the link, and read the article. It is simple, yet profound.
So, for the next fourteen days, I plan to actually pray (out loud, as much as possible) for anyone against whom I am inclined to hold resentments. That would include my own fool self. I will ask God to give them/me happiness and blessings.
Care to join me? There’s plenty of room in this anti-resentment coalition. It isn’t crowded at all!
Moods Leave when I Kick them Out!
I was in a bad mood. The reasons (can I even call them reasons??) are not important. Moods rarely, if ever have reasons. They do, however, have consequences. My mood compromised my ability to fully appreciate worship, my wife, the lovely weather, and everything else in the universe.
One of the things that helped me greatly was a quote from Oswald Chambers (I believe, from his book, My Utmost for His Highest). I have italicized (thus, emphasis mine) the section that especially spoke to me.
“In your patience possess ye your souls. — Luke 21:19
When a man is born again, there is not the same robustness in his thinking or reasoning for a time as formerly. We have to make an expression of the new life, to form the mind of Christ. “Acquire your soul with patience” (rv). Many of us prefer to stay at the threshold of the Christian life instead of going on to construct a soul in accordance with the new life God has put within. We fail because we are ignorant of the way we are made, we put things down to the devil instead of our own undisciplined natures. Think what we can be when we are roused!
There are certain things we must not pray about — moods, for instance. Moods never go by praying, moods go by kicking. A mood nearly always has its seat in the physical condition, not in the moral. It is a continual effort not to listen to the moods which arise from a physical condition; never submit to them for a second. We have to take ourselves by the scruff of the neck and shake ourselves, and we will find that we can do what we said we could not. The curse with most of us is that we won’t. The Christian life is one of incarnate spiritual pluck.”
Are you like me? Do you need to do some mood-kicking?
“THE EVERY-WHERE-NESS OF GOD”
“No atomic particle is so small that God is not fully present to it, and no galaxy so vast that God does not circumscribe it. No space is without the divine presence. God is in touch with every part of creation. God cannot be excluded from any location or object in creation . . .” (Thomas C. Oden, The Living God, p. 67, italics mine).
All of us addicts know that craving for a fix is not simply a mental or spiritual problem. It is certainly that, but it is more: Addictions enslave us, even at the molecular level. Every cell in our body cries out for the substance or activity to which we are addicted. This is true, no matter what our addiction.
Researchers are beginning to see this more clearly as well. Addicts have always known it—at least, those of us who have experienced some measure of sanity. Until I had acknowledged my addiction and had some success in recovering from it, I had no clue how powerful the addiction was. You only know the power of your enemy when you seek to resist him.
However, an ancient observation about God comforted me and challenged me greatly the other day: God is everywhere at the same time. There is no place, large or small, distant to us or near us, where God is not present all the time.
God is present in every cell that craves something that feels good, but isn’t good. God is just as present in the cells of my body as God is present in the most distant galaxy.
“7 I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence!
8 If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.
9 If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
10 even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.
11 I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night–
12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you.
13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous– how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.” (Psalm 139:7-15, New Living Translation. Italics in the quoted verses is my own.)
However, is God’s omnipresence good news or bad news?
That depends on whether God is really good and has our best interest in God’s mind and heart. I believe that goodness is indeed the way God is. However, I freely admit that this is a statement of faith, and that there is plenty of evidence that would suggest that there is either an evil god or no god at all.
I have a friend who is a very fine friend and a very fine artist. He gave me one of his pieces that I like a lot. It is a small block of wood with a canvas stretched out on it. It is entirely black—except for one very tiny point of light. He calls the piece “Hope.”
Frequently, I seem to be able to see only the darkness. Sometimes, I can see the point of light, but it seems way too small to make any difference.
But once in a while, I see more. I see hope. Perhaps the presence of a good God everywhere, even at the cellular level, is a point of light in the darkness, a beacon of hope.
DOWN TO EARTH BELIEVER
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- “The Process in Miracles and the Miracle of Process” March 11, 2024“2 Kings 5:1 Naaman, commander of the army of the king of Syria, was a great man with his master and in high favor, because by him the LORD had given victory to Syria. He was a mighty man of valor, but he was a leper. 2 Now the Syrians on one of their raids […]
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- “Endurance” March 10, 2024“For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.” (Hebrews 10:36, English Standard Version) “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us […]
- “The Limits of Non-Judgmentalism” February 24, 2024“Matt. 7:1 “Judge not, that you be not judged. Matt. 7:2 For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.” (Matthew 7:1-2, English Standard Version) This morning, in my virtual 12-step meeting, we discussed the topic of judgmentalism. There were many wise […]
- “Delighting in Being Told What to Do?!?” February 23, 2024“Psa. 112:1 Praise the LORD! Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, who greatly delights in his commandments! 2 His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. 3 Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures […]
- “Character is the Real Lesson” January 19, 2024I am often confused about what lesson I’m really supposed to be learning. For example, this morning I was trying to knock out several Spanish lessons. My intentions were a lot better than my internet connection. I’ve done three lessons. Or rather, I’ve done two lessons. One of them I did twice because the internet […]
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- “Searching for the Noble One” December 26, 2023My wife and I were reading Luke, chapter 2 on Christmas Day. Luke 2 talks about the shepherds being told to look for this very special child—in fact, this King—in a stable. I prefer the word “barn”. I grew up on a farm. I know what a barn is. A stable is entirely too biblical […]
- “That Don’t Impress God Much” December 14, 2023DTEB, “That Don’t Impress God Much” “That Don’t Impress Me Much” (Song by Robert John Lange and Shania Twain) Micah 6:8 (MSG) “But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be […]
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