“OF CHANGE, HEARTS, FULL MOONS, AND LOVELY SUNRISES”
Are you familiar with the Joe Raposo Sesame Street song? It has a nice, catchy tune and really profound lyrics.
“I nearly missed a rainbow
I nearly missed a sunset
I nearly missed a shooting star
I nearly missed a rainbow
I nearly missed a sunset
I nearly missed a shooting star going by
While lookin’ at my feet, at a crack in the sidewalk
An old tin can by the side of the road
I nearly missed a rainbow
I nearly missed a sunset
I nearly missed a shooting star going by
While studying a brand new hole in my sneaker
And finding a quarter and an old bus token
I nearly missed a rainbow
I nearly missed a sunset
I nearly missed a shooting star going by
Looking down at the ground means you know where you’re going
No head up in the clouds to lead you astray
But you can’t ever have any kind of dream that way
Looking down at the ground means you know where you’re going
No head up in the clouds to lead you astray
But you can’t ever have any kind of dream that way
While looking at my feet at a crack in the sidewalk
An old tin can by the side of the road
I nearly missed a rainbow
Elmo nearly missed a sunset
I would’ve missed a shooting star going by
I nearly missed a rainbow
Don’t want to miss that sunset
I wouldn’t miss a shooting start going by
Passing me by
Passing me by.”
Sometimes, we all lose our focus.
So, I was waiting for my ride to the twelve-step meeting this morning. I was walking around looking for change in the parking lot at Planet Fitness, keeping one eye out for someone arriving for an early morning workout. People who haven’t had their second cup of coffee can be a little less than alert than they need to be.
I found a dime, which gave me great cause for rejoicing. It also inspired me to keep looking. No more money, I’m afraid.
And then it hit me: It was a cool, clear morning with a big bright full moon. The sun was already making its presence known, and there were some lovely fluffy clouds in the eastern sky, roughly the color of orange sherbet. And here I was, with my head down, looking for a few coins! I was missing the real treasure.
This is especially ironic because, just an hour or so before my treasure hunt, I had read the following words from Matthew 6:21, in my 3-Minute Retreat from Loyola Press:
“For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be.”
Then the retreat master for the day made these simple, yet profound, comments:
“Whatever we claim as treasure in our lives is where we put the bulk of our effort and energy. Over time we generally grow in understanding of what is really important to us, and we let go of some things in order to have the time and energy for things that are more important. For people of faith, treasure is found in the love God has for us, in our love for God, and in the love we have for others. The choices we make each day are based on what we treasure.”
I would only add that God’s creation is also something we should treasure.
So, I quit looking for coins in the parking lot, and instead spent a bit of time worshiping the God who made full moons, sunrises, and cool mornings.
“Confidence: Cultivating Courage in Others in the Little Things”
“Then David continued, “Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Don’t be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. He will see to it that all the work related to the Temple of the LORD is finished correctly.” (1 Chronicles 28:20)
David was about to die, and was encouraging his son, Solomon, to build the temple. “Be strong and courageous, and do the work!” says David.
Does it really take courage to build a temple? Yes, as a matter of fact, it does!
My wife and I just did a little project at our house. We were having the kitchen remodeled. Others did the really hard work—installing the cabinets and setting the countertops.
However, when the company that was overseeing the project wanted $400.00 to hook the kitchen sink back up after the countertops were set, my wife and I decided to do it ourselves.
Now, I come from a family of very capable artisans and fixer-uppers. However, I am an outlier in my family. Words? Yes! Fixing stuff? Generally speaking, no!
However, my wife used a major incantation to relax my very uncourageous muscles. She said, “We can do this.”
“We” is such a magic word!
A friend confirmed my wife’s spell. He even said that we would have fun doing it. And we did! (The same friend said that we should not try to wallpaper together. He warned me that divorce lawyers camped out around wallpaper stores in order to drum up business. Warning duly noted!)
“We can do this,” she said. And we did! And, yes, it really was fun!
We tend to think of courage as something soldiers and firemen demonstrate. I don’t doubt that this is true. However, there are the smaller chances for courage that are also important. To show courage is a wonderful thing. To encourage courage in others is perhaps even more wonderful.
I conclude with a note that I left at my wife’s place at the table this morning.
“My Dearest,
One of the gifts that you give me is confidence. You have a can-do attitude, not only for yourself, but also for me.
When you believe that I can do something, I have more courage to at least try. And sometimes, really quite often these days, I succeed!
Courage is not simply a gift we are given or achieve. Courage is a gift we give others.
With Great love and Appreciation,
Your Sweetheart
“Warning! Cautionpassenger Approaching!”
I receive a wonderful word-of-the-day each weekday from the site https://wordsmith.org/awad/index.html. (You can and should sign up for this free daily e mail as well.)
This week’s words are “tosspot words”. Tosspot words, according to Anu Garg, are compound words made up of a verb (which occurs first) and a noun. The noun must be the object of the verb. (There are other definitions of the word “tosspot.” These include a person who drinks too much, or anyone who does anything objectionable. It is one of those wonderful British all-purpose insults.)
Today’s word was “cutpurse,” which in an old word which means the same thing as “pickpocket.”
Anu told a wonderful story of going home to India as a university student. He was on a train. Several men gone on the train at a station. One of them warned young Anu that he needed to be very careful. There were a lot of pickpockets around. Anu patted his billfold, which was still there. When he got off the train, it wasn’t. Apparently, the man who had warned him about pickpockets was the pickpocket—or cutpurse, if you will.
Anu came up with a wonderful tosspot word for the man who had warned him and lightened his load: “Mr. Cautionpassenger.”
This set me to thinking, not so much about words, as about reality. It may be that the people who are warning us are the real danger. Often people who are wanting to warn us about things may be the very perpetrators of the thing about which they are warning us. (The Apostle Paul warned us of the same thing. You may read Romans 2:1ff. for further details.)
Watch out for those who warn you to be careful about your investments. They may be about to sell you fraudulent stocks.
Watch out for those who warn you about liars. They are probably lying to you.
Watch out for those who warn you about sexual misconduct. They are probably on the make.
Be ware of people who warn you about people who warn you about people.
Be ware of all “cautionpassengers.”
We seem to live in a time when everyone is warning everyone about everyone. The liberals warn us of the conservatives, and conservatives warn us of the liberals. The Republicans warn us about the Democrats, and the Democrats do the same concerning the Republicans. Those who like to think of themselves as “independents” may be the biggest cautionpassengers of all, since they warn us of everyone.
I think that the real issue underneath the issues is fear of our own fear. However, those who encourage us to fear others, no matter who the “others” are, may be the real danger.
This danger is two-fold. On the one hand, we ourselves are easily manipulated by fear. On the other hand, we try to manipulate others with fear. We are all, at least in some measure, “cautionpassengers.” And, of course, this blog is a warning against all who warn you of things. Thus, my posting of this both illustrates and violates the very thing I am warning you about.
If we cultivated within our own selves deep integrity, we would not be as prone to manipulate others by their own fears. We might also be less prone to allow cautionpassengers to manipulate us with our own fears.
“LET’S PARTY!”
“His son said to him, ’Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you; I no longer deserve to be called your son.’ But his father ordered his servants, ’Quickly bring the finest robe and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Take the fattened calf and slaughter it. Then let us celebrate with a feast, because this son of mine was dead, and has come to life again; he was lost, and has been found.’ Then the celebration began.” (Luke 15:21-24)
The son seems to have been expecting only bare acceptance as a hired hand (verse 17), but he received an abundantly joyous welcome—indeed, a party—as a son. We always tend to underestimate God. The runaway son was expecting merely enough food to keep him from starving. Instead, he was the guest of honor at a feast.
This son, this son, who had demanded his share of the inheritance, even though his father was still alive, this son, came draggin’ his sorry butt back home, begging for mercy.
I am that son. So are you—or daughter, as the case may be.
And what do we expect? Mere acceptance, perhaps. If we’re lucky.
And what do we experience? God’s glad embrace and kisses. Words of affirmation. A wild party at which we are the guests of honor.
We talk a lot about the unconditional love of God, but we have no real idea. The parable of the Father’s lavish love for his runaway son (and the stay-at-home son as well), should shove us in the direction of a better view of God’s love. Sometimes, stories like this succeed in getting people to run, walk, or crawl in that general direction.
And then, there is the redemptive love of Jesus, as shown on the cross.
“A Reflection on Spoiled Milk”
“He that to what he sees, adds observation, and to what he reads, reflection, is in the right road to knowledge.
—Caleb Colton
We are not just feathers blown on the winds of a powerless life. We bring ourselves to our experiences. The dynamics of learning include, first, what happens – what we see or read or hear – and, second, what we make of it. So in our observations and reflections we consider what an event means to us.” (Excerpt from the book, Touchstones, published by Hazelden Press)
I used to think that reflection involved the big questions. Is there a God? If so, what is God like? What is the purpose of life? What is the purpose of my life?
This morning, I realized that a reflection on spoiled milk will do nicely enough.
In our household, we buy milk when it is cheap. The problem is, we don’t drink as much of it as we used to. So we freeze milk. Sometimes, we even remember that we’ve frozen some milk.
The milk we had this morning—until I poured it down the drain about ten minutes ago—was spoiled. My wife casually, in her best non-accusatory voice, said, “I think some of the frozen milk was poured in with the fresh milk I bought.”
I was irritated. I was irritated because I don’t like wasting money. I was irritated because, I was the one who had poured the frozen milk on top of the fresher milk. I was irritated because I was irritated.
But I had just read this bit about reflecting, so I said to myself, “Self, why don’t you reflect on spoiled milk, and your attitudes, values, and actions?”
So, that is what I did. I got quiet and reflected. Here are the results of my reflection on spoiled milk.
First, the saying, “Don’t cry over spilt milk,” came to mind. Perhaps crying over spoilt milk wasn’t necessary or helpful either.
Next, I asked myself a really crucial question: What am I really irritated about? I didn’t like the answer, but here it is anyway.
I was irritated because I was trying too hard to please my wife and it wasn’t working.
You see, my wife likes to bake. This works out nicely, because I like to eat! And she bakes for other folks as well.
But, in order to bake, she often needs room in the fridge for her masterpieces. (And, no, that is not an overstatement or sarcasm. They really are masterpieces, though she rarely thinks so.)
If my Martha-Stewart-style wife needs to put things in the fridge, there has to be room. This is a simple application of the second law of physics that states that two bodies cannot occupy the same space at the same time. Be that as it may, it’s a law.
Are you lost yet? Or is this entirely too simple for you? Truth is almost always both simple and elusive.
So, the reason I had poured the frozen milk into the jug with the newer milk was to economize on space. And the reason I wanted to economize on space was that I wanted to please my wife.
Now, there is nothing wrong with wanting to please people, particularly people who are close to us—except when there is something wrong with it. If it gets out of hand, it leads to trying too hard to please people, which swiftly becomes irritating to both the pleasee and the would-be pleaser.
And, of course, when I reflect on my own reflection, I realize that my desire to please my wife is not really always my desire to please my wife. Instead, it is a sneaky way of manipulating her, of pretending that I am in control.
But that’s enough reflection for one day. I can’t handle too much truth all at once. Otherwise, I might go into psychological shock, which can be fatal.
“WHAT IS REALLY STRANGE”
DTEB, “WHAT IS REALLY STRANGE”
Some of us at the meeting this morning decided to walk from the church to the restaurant where we have our after-meeting. There had been a lot of rain, and as we were walking through a shopping center parking lot, we saw a strange sight.
“Look!” one of the guys exclaimed. He was pointing at something in a very shallow puddle of water. It was small, but was moving too fast for any of us to tell what it was. I thought it might be a very small snake. One of the other guys thought it was a tadpole. (He was probably right.)
We stared at it for what seemed a long time, until somebody said, “That is really strange.”
However, one of the men in the group said, “No! What is strange is four guys standing in a parking lot staring at a water puddle.”
The spell was broken, we laughed, and moved on.
Strange things abound in our world. The really strange thing is when humans notice those strange things.
There was a man tending a flock of sheep in a fairly barren area. Apparently, he was starved for entertainment, so he noticed things. But things rarely got weird. One day, they got very weird indeed.
He noticed a bush on fire. No big deal. He had seen that before. But he stared a little longer and furrowed his brow. Something was strange here: The bush was on fire, but it wasn’t burning up! He decided to go over for a closer look.
4 “When the LORD saw Moses coming to take a closer look, God called to him from the middle of the bush, ‘Moses! Moses!’ ‘Here I am!’ Moses replied.
5 ‘Do not come any closer,’ the LORD warned. ‘Take off your sandals, for you are standing on holy ground.’ (Exodus 3:4-5, New Living Translation)
Apparently, the LORD speaking to Moses was closely related to the fact that Moses turned aside to see the bush. It wasn’t the burning bush itself that led to the call of Moses to lead the children of Israel out of Egypt. It was Moses’ curiosity. It would seem that God likes people to be curious, at least, under certain conditions.
Now, obviously, curiosity isn’t always a good thing. It can, in fact, be fatal. But the mere fact that something can be wrong does not mean that it is always a bad thing. (Sex and lots of other things come to mind at this point.) In fact the worst bad things are usually very good things, that have been terribly twisted.
Moses likely regretted his curiosity a thousand times. Getting the children of Israel out of slavery was not a cake walk. And once God had, through Moses, gotten the people out of Egypt, there was the matter of getting them into the Promised Land. The fact of the matter is that the people he had helped bring out of Egypt nearly drove the poor man (and God) crazy. (Read Exodus through Deuteronomy for further details.)
Nevertheless, the truth is this: Whether the Israelites knew it or not, whether Moses liked it or not, it was Moses’ curiosity that ended up being transformative.
I don’t know if our curiosity this morning about some life form in a parking lot puddle will ever be as transformational as Moses’ curiosity before a burning bush in the desert. However, I suspect that the ministry of curious noticing was good for us. And perhaps the really strange thing is that we don’t notice more strange things.
Let’s notice a few strange things today and every day. Who knows? It might be the beginning of freedom for ourselves and others. It might lead to a life-transforming encounter with God.
“GOOD ENOUGH, SMART ENOUGH, AND LIKABLE ENOUGH”
“You are good enough, you are smart enough, and doggonit, people like you.” (Stuart Smalley)
The preceding affirmation is provided by my 12-step sponsor. He encouraged me, several years ago, to begin daily affirmations as well as reports. It is a wonderful discipline! I tend to be a positive person . . . except about myself. My pretty-much daily affirmations help me to set a good tone for my day, even (especially?) toward my own self.
I have struggled, since I was little, with believing—or rather, not believing—that I am good enough, smart enough, or likable enough.
The question, of course, is this: What does the word “enough” mean?
Now, I know what the dictionary meaning is for the word, but what about my own, personal dictionary? What does “enough” mean to me?
A good friend of mine pointed out to me years ago that I don’t want to be a good man. I want to be perfect. I initially disagreed with him, but have finally come around to his way of thinking. To be “good enough” means being perfect. Of course, I’m not perfect, and therefore, I am not good enough!
What utter nonsense! But there it is.
And knowing enough? Same thing. “Knowing enough” means knowing everything. Since I don’t know everything, I obviously don’t know enough.
And about people liking me? Of course many do, and some don’t. But if only enough people liked me, then I would be likable enough. And, of course, “enough people” means everyone.
So, I often tend to drag around, with a low-grade contempt for myself.
However, the Bible—both the Old and the New Testaments—often remind me that life isn’t about what I am, or what or who I think I am. Rather, life is about who God is. God is enough, and therefore, I am enough.
Tomorrow’s affirmation, which I plan to keep in focus even today, is this: By God’s grace, I am good enough, I am smart enough, and doggonit, people like me.
“GOD’S EVER-LOVING PRESENCE”
“Before you begin, pause for a moment. Take several slow, deep breaths and allow yourself to grow still. Be aware of God’s loving presence within you.” (“3-Minute Retreat,” for July 18, 2018, published by Loyola Press)
The quote that begins this post is a fairly common type of intro for these 3-Minute retreats—which I heartily recommend. They are good, quick, and free.
But the fact is that none of us hears anything until our heart and mind are prepared to hear them. For some reason, the phrase “God’s loving presence” caught my attention today.
Here is the problem, at least, as I see it: I have often believed (often only at a theoretical level) that God is present as the all-powerful, all-knowing Judge. But as a loving presence—not so much!
What difference does it make to me if I think of God as an ever-present loving presence?
I can’t get my mind around God, but I can think analogically. And the best analogy at this point is my relationship with my wife. I am, generally, a better man when my wife is around, period. I know that she loves me and that I love her. I am much less likely to say something stupid and mean-spirited when she is around. I am much less likely to fly into road rage. I am much less likely to notice (for too long) other lovely ladies. (And they are all lovely, aren’t they?)
Now, in the deepest possible sense, my wife is always with me. We are so in love that we have, quite profoundly, become one. So, in reality, I need to always watch my mouth, my anger, my eyes, since my wife is ever in my heart and on my mind.
But if God is The Loving Presence in my life, I need always to recognize that every situation, every decision, every interaction with others, is surrounded and filled and supercharged with the love of God.
How would that change every situation, every decision, every interaction? How wouldn’t it?!
Dear readers, I hope you go through this day with a profound and abiding sense of God’s loving presence! I hope that I do as well!
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