One of my most encouraging friends made a wonderful suggestion. Knowing my tendency to notice my failings, but not what I get right, my friend asked if I ever made a list of good things that I’ve done at the end of the day.
The short answer was, “No.”
However, thanks to Gary’s question, the answer is now, Yes!” But man, is it ever hard! I’m pretty good at remembering my wrong-doings, both the small and the great. My good deeds? Not so much.
Of course, if a body is already pretty full of himself or herself, making a list of daily deeds might not be the best idea. There are those who remember only their accomplishments—even their imaginary accomplishments.
Ultimately, as a Christ-follower, I believe that my lists are not the most important lists. The most important lists are the ones God keeps. There are Scriptures that speak of God keeping a list of the good things we do. Some lists are specifically designated as written down. In some cases, the lists are implied lists.
Malachi 3:16-17 is a good example of a list of good things.
“Mal. 3:16 ¶ Then those who feared the LORD spoke with one another. The LORD paid attention and heard them, and a book of remembrance was written before him of those who feared the LORD and esteemed his name.
Mal. 3:17 “They shall be mine, says the LORD of hosts, in the day when I make up my treasured possession, and I will spare them as a man spares his son who serves him.”
Apparently, fearing the LORD and speaking about him to other believers catches God’s attention.
Jesus listed a number of positive good deeds that would be mentioned on judgment day in Matthew 25:31-40. These deeds included caring for the hungry and thirsty, hospitality, clothing the naked, and visiting those who are sick or in prison. Jesus not only notices, but also considers these good deeds to have been done for him.
Of course, the idea that God keeps records of our deeds is not altogether comforting, is it? What about our bad deeds? Yes, according to Romans 2:6, in the supernatural course of things, God will repay each person according to his/her deeds.
But then there are other Scriptures that point out a wonderfully surprising—even shocking—truth. Here is one of these shockers:
“Psa. 130:3 If you, O LORD, should mark iniquities,
O Lord, who could stand?
4 But with you there is forgiveness,
that you may be feared.”
According to this verse, God doesn’t keep a record of our sins. He leaves that up to our fellow sinners. However, for the unwisdom of us keeping a record of the wrong-doings of others, see 1 Corinthians 13:5.
“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father,
from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named,
that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being,
so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love,
may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth,
and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us,
to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Ephesians 3:4-21, English Standard Version)
My friend, Steve, prayed this morning that “God would give [me] the strength to believe that I am loved.”
Yes! It takes strength to believe that! There is so much hatred in the world, so much hatred in me, that love seems delusional. Also, I remember all the evil I’ve done. It is difficult to love a person like me, even when I’m me.
I wondered whether there were any Bible passages that linked strength with love. The passage from Ephesians that leads off this post came to mind.
Several things are of interest here. First, did you notice that the Triune God is involved in this strengthening process? The Father is invoked in verse 14, the Holy Spirit in verse 16, and Christ Jesus in verses 17, 18, and 21. We’ve got some pretty ferocious Lovers on our side!
Second, this is not a promise for pious particles, for individuals. Rather, this is a corporate promise. The pronouns “we” and “you” are all plural. None of us, by ourselves, can even begin to understand the love of God for us. We need one another.
Third, this is a kind of love that we can know. In fact, Paul prays that we can know this love.
However, fourth, we are called to know this love which surpasses knowledge. How can we know something that surpasses knowledge? I don’t know, but that is what Paul is wishing and praying for the people to whom he is writing. And, since I believe that the Bible is God’s Word for all people of all times, it is also God’s desire for all of us.
Fifth, being strengthened to experience love is a demanding business. Foulkes comments, “The word translated may have power (Gk. exischysēte) and also the verb comprehend (katalabesthai), meaning ‘an earnest grasping’, suggest the difficulty of the task envisaged, simply because it is no mere intellectual feat, but a matter of practical experience, a living together in love which is inevitably costly.”[1]
Finally, this love is God’s love for us, as shown especially in his Son, Christ Jesus. However, it is also our love for others. Again, Foulkes comments, “However we interpret the dimensions of verse 17, the definite goal to which the Christian life must move, and for which therefore the apostle prays, is for his readers to know the love of Christ, to know how he loved and loves, and to experience his love in loving him and loving others for his sake.”[2]
Let’s pray to be strong in love today! Strong in believing that we are loved, and
strong in loving God and others.
[1]Francis Foulkes, Ephesians: An Introduction and Commentary, TNTC 10; IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1989), 111.
[2]Francis Foulkes, Ephesians: An Introduction and Commentary, TNTC 10; IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1989), 112.
that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being,
so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love,
may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth,
and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us,
to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Ephesians 3:4-21, English Standard Version)
My friend, Steve, prayed this morning that “God would give [me] the strength to believe that I am loved.”
Yes! It takes strength to believe that! There is so much hatred in the world, so much hatred in me, that love seems delusional.
But then, I wondered whether there were any Bible passages that linked strength with love. The passage from Ephesians that leads off this post came to mind.
Several things are of interest here. First, did you notice that the Triune God is involved in this strengthening process? The Father is invoked in verse 14, the Holy Spirit in verse 16, and Christ Jesus in verses 17, 18, and 21.
Second, this is not a promise for pious particles, for individuals. Rather, this is a corporate promise. The pronouns “we” and “you” are all plural. None of us, by ourselves, can even begin to understand the love of God for us. We need one another.
Third, this is a kind of love that we can know. In fact, Paul prays that we can know this love.
However, fourth, we are called to know this love which surpasses knowledge. How can we know something that surpasses knowledge? I don’t know, but that is what Paul is wishing and praying for the people to whom he is writing. And, since I believe that the Bible is God’s Word for all people of all times, it is also God’s desire for all of us.
Fifth, being strengthened to experience love is a demanding business. Foulkes comments, “The word translated may have power (Gk. exischysēte) and also the verb comprehend (katalabesthai), meaning ‘an earnest grasping’, suggest the difficulty of the task envisaged, simply because it is no mere intellectual feat, but a matter of practical experience, a living together in love which is inevitably costly.”[1]
Finally, this love is both God’s love for us, as shown especially in his Son, Christ Jesus. However, it is also our love for others. Again, Foulkes comments, “However we interpret the dimensions of verse 17, the definite goal to which the Christian life must move, and for which therefore the apostle prays, is for his readers to know the love of Christ, to know how he loved and loves, and to experience his love in loving him and loving others for his sake.”[2]
Lets pray to be strong in love today! Strong in believing that we are loved, and
also strong in loving God and others.
[1]Francis Foulkes, Ephesians: An Introduction and Commentary, TNTC 10; IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1989), 111.
[2]Francis Foulkes, Ephesians: An Introduction and Commentary, TNTC 10; IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1989), 112.
Nothing feels much worse than feeling like you don’t belong. I’ve been feeling that way a lot here of late.
On the other hand, to be where you feel like you do belong is one of the most wonderful feelings in the world.
I am visiting some of my wife’s family who live in southern Kentucky. They know all my failings. Perhaps not every detail of my failings, but they know all the broad contours and many of the details. And they love me. I feel like I belong. That’s because I do.
I don’t belong because I’m good. I’m not all that good, though I’m probably considerably better (and safer) than I used to be. I belong because they take seriously God’s grace to them and to me. They have taken the platitude “The ground is level at the cross of Christ,” and turned it into a profound truth by actually living it out. They make the love of God more real to me than it has been of late.
Right after we arrived here, I prayed a desperate prayer: “Oh God, please forgive, and cleanse, and heal.”
And immediately, God said, “I have, I am, and I will.”
I don’t very often feel that God speaks to me directly. That may well be because I’m not listening, of course.
Sometimes, people who embody the love and forgiveness of God help me to hear a fresh and refreshing Word from God. It is so today.
It is just before 7:00, and I am already at the university where I teach for a 9:00 a.m. class. I like to beat the rush hour traffic. The sun is not up yet, but it is already fairly light out. I sit on bench. I can see the downtown section of Cincinnati, the river, the hills of Kentucky. There is a breeze. Some roses, some weeds, and some trash are gathered at my feet. Birds fly over.
I love the early mornings. However, when you get up at 2:30, 7:00 doesn’t really seem all that early.
And yet, I still struggle with the darkness within.
Darkness comes in many forms. There is the darkness of my past, of the people I’ve hurt. There is the darkness of the people who have rejected me. There are many who seem to believe that I have not changed, that I will never change, that I can’t change.
I think they’re wrong, but I am not sure. Sometimes, I think that I myself am underselling how much I’ve grown, how much I’ve changed for the better. At other times . . .
The sun is coming up now over some very large building across the hill. I need some light for this day, some hope, some peace.
A bird sings.
Zacharias, an aged man with his aged wife Elizabeth, had experienced the darkness of being unable to have a child. And then, when all hope was gone, they were miraculously given a son. Zacharias sang a song to his newborn, and the gospel writer Luke wrote it down. Here is part of the song Zacharias sang to his son:
“76 And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High;
for you will go before the Lord to prepare his ways,
77 to give knowledge of salvation to his people
in the forgiveness of their sins,
78 because of the tender mercy of our God,
whereby the sunrise shall visit usfrom on high
79 to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death,
to guide our feet into the way of peace.”
The knowledge of salvation, the forgiveness of sins, the tender mercy of our God, sunrise—that all sounds pretty good.
So, I am listening to the song “God Only Knows” (the version with Dolly Parton), and fighting back the tears. I’ve already had a good cry this morning, collapsing on the kitchen floor and dissolving in a puddle of tears. I don’t need to be crying again. I don’t want to go before my students with red eyes and a sinus headache.
The sun is fighting to rise above the clouds. I’m going to bet on the sun today.
I was getting ready very early this morning, preparing to go and teach at the university where I adjunct. I must have rattled around too much. My wife got up.
So did our little dog, who sleeps with my wife most nights. My lovely lady got up for a little while, and our dog got up too—very reluctantly. I took the dog outside to do her business. She got right down to business, and was ready to go back in, and go back to bed.
My wife was in the kitchen finishing packing for me. Our dog ran full-tilt right by my wife and jumped in the bed.
My wife said, “It’s a good thing I left my door open. Otherwise, she would have run right into it!”
True enough!
I said, “I was going to give her a little treat for taking care of business right away.” I paused, waiting to hear our little one’s galloping paws.
Nothing.
I said it again, a little bit louder this time. “I was going to give her a treat.”
A pause. Still nothing.
“I was going to give her a TREAT.”
Finally, we heard the thump of our dog jumping off the bed. She ran into the kitchen, got her treat, and ran full-tilt with it in her mouth back to my wife’s bed.
My wife and I looked at one another and laughed. Our dog was not going to be denied her “momma time!”
I like the things that God gives to me. Food, drinkable water, a house, work that I love to do—all these and 10,000 other blessings per day. These are all wonderful. They go way beyond treats.
But the main thing is to spend time with God. His Presence is the thing, the thing that is beyond any gift that he gives me.
I am not going to be denied my “Heavenly Father time!”
I was recently teaching a course on Old Testament History. On our last class together, I told them that the Old Testament history could be summed up in three statements.
Then I said, “Of course, that is also the history of the entire human race, including each one of us.”
Then I split the class into three small groups, and we shared stories of God’s faithfulness, our unfaithfulness, and our faithfulness.
One student pursued this same theme in her post-class journal entry. I asked my student if I could share her journal entry. She graciously wrote the following:
“Yes, you have permission to share. I’m comfortable with you using my name as long as you promise to give God all the glory.”
“Deb Taylor
Journal, Week #5
Story of God’s Faithfulness
In the early days of my spiritual journey, I learned that my Dad had fallen off a ladder and he had broken his back. Home alone, he crawled to a phone and called 911. Paramedics met the local police at his home and he was taken to the hospital. When I was notified, I immediately drove to the hospital. On my way, I felt a desire to pray with (not just for) my Dad. In the moment, this seemed ridiculous. My Dad was not a faithful man and I was very new in my faith. Immediately, I began to negotiate with God. “Lord, if you will create the space and give me the words, I will pray OUT LOUD with my Dad.” Of course, I had no expectation that God would answer my prayer. In fact, I sort of hoped that he wouldn’t. When I arrived at the hospital, there were five people in the room. I remember thinking, “Clearly, God wouldn’t have me pray in front of these people!” Within two minutes, the two nurses left the room, my aunt and uncle went to the cafeteria, and my Mom left to smoke a cigarette. My Dad and I were alone in the room. God had created the space. My next embarrassing thought was this: I need the words. In a few minutes, my Dad asked me to get a comb for him. He said it was located in the drawer of the nightstand. I opened the drawer to find only two things; a comb and a booklet titled How to Pray for a Loved One. Seriously?! Does God have a sense of humor or what?! There I stood, next to my Dad’s hospital bed, seeing God’s obvious faithfulness. I asked him, “Dad, may I pray for you?” Looking up at me, he said, “Sure. Why? Do you think I’m gonna die?” Using the simple words provided in that tiny book, I prayed for my Dad. I can’t remember the words, but I do remember the presence of the Lord. He is so very faithful.
Story of My Unfaithfulness
Not too long ago, I was having a challenging day at work. Thinking I had privacy, I shared my worries with a peer. She was a fellow believer, a friend, someone I could trust. In the moment, I felt the whisper of the Lord, “Shhh.” I ignored the prompting to ZIP IT. Truly, it didn’t occur to me that my venting was really gossiping. I had no idea that our conversation was being overheard. Days later, I learned that someone had shared the details of that conversation with my supervisor. My reputation was damaged and my relationship with my boss was dented, neither beyond repair, but the entire situation could have been avoided if I had walked in obedience.
Story of My Faithfulness to God
Mission trips to Haiti can be energizing and also emotionally depleting. After one particularly difficult morning of serving in the local prison and then teaching Bible stories in the brothel, I retreated to my tent to recharge. I rested, read, and journaled before asking the Lord how he might have me spend my afternoon. With clarity, I felt his nudge go to the Eye Surgery Clinic. “No, not me! That must be a mistake. I faint when I see blood. You wouldn’t want ME to go THERE…” Slowly, I walked in the direction of the Eye Clinic. On my way, I met one of the pastors at the mission. He asked if I might have time to help him. “Of course!” (I was looking for any other possible afternoon assignment.) “Wonderful,” he said, “Please go to the Eye Clinic. We have over 700 people lined up, waiting for prayer. Please start praying for people.”
Saturday, August 3, 2019
A good reading from Hazelden Publishing:
“Saturday, August 3
To live a spiritual life we must first find the
courage to enter into the desert of loneliness and to change it by gentle and
persistent efforts into a garden of solitude.
—Henri J. M. Nouwen
Knowing our loneliness and admitting it to us is the beginning of a spiritual
path for many men. Today we are on a spiritual journey. We already have the
means to translate the pain of our loneliness into a deeper spiritual
dimension. Most men in this program came in deeply aware of their feelings of
isolation. Now, with the companionship of our Higher Power, we can spend time
alone and use it for spiritual growth. As we develop a relationship with
ourselves and deepen our knowledge of our Higher Power, our loneliness
transforms into solitude.
In this quiet moment today, we can be more accepting of ourselves than we were
in the past. We admit loneliness has caused us pain, but now we can see that it
also can lead us to our deeper self where we find serene solitude. This change
is a movement into the spiritual world.
Thanks to God for the solitude I have found in my life.” (From Touchstones: A Book of Daily
Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
To say that I am in way over my head in teaching various courses at the university would be an understatement. Perhaps, though, that enables me to be more sympathetic with my fellow-students of the Word. Maybe we are all in over our heads in life and in our pursuit of the God who has pursued us.
No unchecked regrets today! I went down to the breakfast area for my second cup of coffee this morning, and a young couple with a small child and a baby were having breakfast. I was filled with regret that I did not treat my wife and the kids better.
But God reminded me that I can never go back. There are no re-dos for anything that is worthwhile. There is only this day, and its chances to be patient, kind, and compassionate to others—and even to myself. Regret focuses me on the unalterable past, and keeps me from the awareness of the present chances to love. Real love is always a present-tense verb.
We all feel overwhelmed at times. Even good things, things we enjoy and feel passionate about, can inundate us with fear and frustration. No one is exempt from being overwhelmed. For example, here is my journal entry for this morning:
Friday, July 26, 2019
So, why have I not been posting more blogs, you ask? Partly, because I have been getting more chances to teach. And while I love teaching biblical subjects, I am more than a little overwhelmed right now. (Can you be a little overwhelmed?)
Here is what I am facing right now. I had done a lot of work on a couple of courses for the fall semester, which is coming up in a hurry. A few days ago, I was asked to switch out those two courses for two others. I thought to myself, well, I need to be flexible. I’m an adjunct. Okay, I’ll do it. Then, I discovered that one class has sixty-one students in it, and the other has twenty-one. I’ve never taught a class bigger than about thirty. So, I need to choose textbooks and get the syllabi together for these two classes, and I have very little time in which to do it.
Additionally, I am currently teaching one undergraduate class, and preparing to teach two masters level classes in a little over a week. These two masters level courses are hybrid classes, which means that I will be meeting with students in person for a very intensive week in early August. One class goes from 8:00 to noon, and the other from 1:00 to 5:00, five days of that week.
So, I have too much to do and too little time to get it done. I need to work on both sides of the equation—the too much to do, and the too little time. I can do two fundamental things.
First, I need to keep doing things that energize me and keep me on the right path. Therefore, I need to continue to exercise and to work at recovery from this addiction. If I “free up more time” by means of refusing to work on bodily health and recovery wisdom, I am walking in neither wisdom nor freedom.
Second, I need to cut back radically on what I “need” to do. Do I really need to do this? That is a question I need to ask myself many times in the course of the day. And I need to follow up with another question: What do I really need to be doing right now?
Right now, a bird is singing outside my window right now, anticipating the dawn. It is a call to worship for Matins, the Morning Song Service for the worship of God. This song is also part of the healthy rhythms of my life. And so is this blog post.
Hazelden Publishing has some wonderful readings that are both free and radically helpful. Here is one of them for today:
“Sunday, July 21
I wake each morning with the thrill of expectation and the
joy of being truly alive. And I’m thankful for this day.
—Angela L. Wozniak
Being open to the day’s offering, all of it, and looking for the positive
experiences therein, becomes habit only after a firm commitment and dedicated
practice. Today is special for each of us.
These next twenty-four hours will be unlike all others. And we are not the
persons we were, even as recently as yesterday. Looking forward to all of the
day’s events, with the knowledge that we are in the care of our higher power,
in every detail, frees us to make the most of everything that happens.
We have been given the gift of life. We are survivors. The odds against
survival in our past make clear we have yet a job to do and are being given the
help to do it. Confidence wavers in all of us, but the strength we need will be
given to each of us.
In this day that stands before me, I can be certain that I’ll have many chances
for growth, for kindness to others, for developing confidence in myself. I will
be thoughtful in my actions today. They are special and will be repeated no
more.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey.”
I liked this entire reading, but was especially struck by the words, “Being open to the day’s offering, all of it, and looking for the positive experiences therein, becomes habit only after a firm commitment and dedicated practice.”
Firm commitment and dedicated practice: Yes! That is what it takes. And it sounds good. But then, there is the actual commitment and practice. And how do I know I’m truly committed? By practice, practice, practice.
In virtually every area of my life, I don’t like practice. It is hard, boring, and repetitive. But it is also essential. A quote that I’ve heard attributed to different musicians (perhaps by the Polish pianist Ignace Paderewski) goes like this:
“If I don’t practice for one day, I know it.
If I don’t practice for two days, the critics know it.
If I don’t practice for three days, everyone knows it.”
God, help me to practice good stuff today.
“Today, by God’s grace, I am pursuing God with my body, mind, spirit, and soul. I keep pursuing God until God catches me, which he has already done.”
“My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me.” (Psalm 63:8, English Standard Version)
The psalmist says that, with his very soul, his very essence, he clings to God. The Hebrew word for “to cling” (davaq) is used for the first time in Genesis 2:24 for the attachment of a man to his lady. It is a rather intense word, to say the least! As Kidner points out, “In the present verse it is strenuous: lit. ‘clings after thee’, as if in hot pursuit. The old translation [i.e., the KJV] remains the best: ‘my soul followeth hard after thee.’”
And yet, the psalmist knows that it isn’t just about his clinging to God. No. In the same breath, he acknowledges that God’s right hand is upholding him. Again, Kidner wisely observes the following: “But it is God himself who makes this possible, and the firmness of his upholding grasp is implied in the allusion to the right hand, the stronger of the two; cf. Isaiah 41:10. There is the same divine-human interplay in Philippians 3:8–14.”[1]
So, is the psalmist in hot pursuit of God, or is God holding the psalmist? The answer is emphatically “Yes!” We are most definitely responsible to pursue God. But we also most definitely need to be aware that God is holding us.
I am reminded of what someone said about human courtship and dating. (I think that I might have heard it first from my mom.) It went something like this: “He chased her and chased her, until finally, she caught him.”
We need to chase God and chase God until God finally catches us. And when God does catch us? What then? Then, we realize that God was holding us all along.
Pursue diligently!
Relax extravagantly! God’s got this. God’s got you and me, too.
[1]Derek Kidner, Psalms 1–72: An Introduction and Commentary, TOTC 15; IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1973), 244.
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