Monthly Archives: November 2016
“GETTING RID OF BIG BUTS AND MAKING AMENDS”
A good friend of mine reminded me the other day that, if I was really going to make amends to someone I had wronged, I needed not to tell the person what he had done to provoke my wrong.
Ouch! Whoever said that truth hurts was telling the truth. Truth does hurt—a lot. However, there is the pain of falsehood, and there is the pain of truth. Falsehood causes us a pain that quickly makes us numb. Truth is another word for growing pains.
The problem is that I tend to have a lot of big buts. No, the last word in the preceding sentence is not misspelled.
I try to apologize for something wrong I’ve done, BUT I also try to explain my actions as being caused by what the other person did to me. That is not an amends; it’s an explanation.
So, I’ve decided that what I really need to do is to simply say, “I was wrong when I did/said ______________ about you/to you. I am sorry, and will try to do better.”
In other words, I need to have a “butectomy.” You’ve never heard the word before? Me neither! I just made it up.
The suffix “-ectomy” means “excision.” The word “but” means . . ., well, you know what that word means, don’t you?
I have often pointed out that we always put the real things, the things we really believe, on the right side of our but. Now, I need to apply this to my buts.
I was fudging with the title of this post. I spoke of getting rid of big buts. That is not enough when I’m trying to make amends. I need to get rid of all buts if I want to give someone a genuine amend or apology.
“Toward a More Civil Approach to One Another”
I have not been very civil here of late. That is putting it mildly! The other night, I went off verbally on one of my coworkers at the restaurant, and even threw a soggy, dirty cleaning cloth at him.
That is not civil discourse!
Do you ever find it difficult to remain courteous toward those with whom you disagree, or those whom you think are being unkind? I believe that I detect a spike in a lack of civility in our society as a whole. Perhaps I’m mistaken, though. Perhaps it’s just me.
I’m not sure if all the election news in the past year or so has caused, exacerbated, or merely reflected this lack of civility. Perhaps election news (and the election itself) has done all three.
I do know this for sure: I can’t directly affect the civility of other people or the nation , but I can get my own lack of civility under God’s control—and my control.
How do I plan to do that? I’m not sure that I have a plan, but I do have some random thoughts.
First, I need to remember that my worth is not measured by what people say to me or about me. I find that most of my lack of civility is triggered by people who speak rudely to me. The truth is that I am thin-skinned. Perhaps the reason one particular political figure irritates me so much is that I see myself in him—and I don’t like what I see! I say that my worth comes from God. Perhaps I should begin to believe that, and act on that belief.
Second, when I have feelings of being under attack, I need to stop and think. What is the proper response here? Nuclear reactors can be dangerous. So can human reactors. A thoughtful (and gentle) response is always better than a quick come-back.
Third, I can pray the serenity prayer. I have a tendency to pray that prayer when I’m already pretty serene. It is more important to pray the serenity prayer when I’m not in a serene situation.
Well, there it is: my blog for today. I greatly fear that it is more a confessional than a blog post.
“God’s Requirements” (Micah 6, 8)
“He has told you, O man, what is good; And what does the LORD require of you But to do justice, to love kindness, And to walk humbly with your God?” (NAU Micah 6:8)
So, what is required of me? Micah 6:8 is a verse that haunts me. Micah makes it sound straightforward, if not easy. (It may be straightforward, but it is not easy, as Micah no doubt realized.)
The word for “seeks” is dôrēsh. This is a participle, which suggestions ongoing or continual action, flowing from the character of the one who is seeking. In this case, since it refers to God, it is the One who is seeking.
God seeking us! Now, there is a picture! We sometimes speak of seeking God, and the Bible speaks in that way as well. However, Micah 6:8 speaks of God seeking something from us.
It is not enough that the One occasionally sees me doing what is right and fair, or loving mercy, or walking humbly. The question is this: Does God catch me living in that manner at all times? The question answers itself.
Well, what about today? Will God (“my God”, as Micah says) catch me doing what is right each moment of today? Theoretically, this is possible. However, as they say, the devil is in the details. However, God is also in the details. For some reason, we seem to think that the devil is more involved in the details than God is.
And here is the problem, it seems to me: Other parts of the Bible point out that seeking the LORD God is not so easy, and that, therefore, obedience to what God is seeking from us is not easy. It requires the whole heart (Jeremiah 29:13.) And who of us actually seeks God—or anything, for that matter—with a whole heart? Indeed, there are some Bible verses that suggest that no one really seeks God. (See Psalm 53:2-3 and Romans 3:11 for further details.)
The very fact that God so often commands God’s own people, Israel, to seek God suggests that seeking God does not come naturally.
I am comforted by the teaching of Jesus, who said, “The Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which is lost” (Luke 19:10). Perhaps the bottom line is this: We can only seek the one who has first sought and saved us. Only so, can we begin to fulfill what God spoke through the prophet Micah.
The Long War
I met him in a church basement, a few days into my service in The Long War. He was old and grizzled and his face was scarred from many a wound. He was drinking his coffee black, no sugar.
“Come sit down, young soldier,” he growled, somewhere between an invitation and an order.
I sat.
He looked me up and down. We sat in silence. His eyes came to rest on my eyes, looking not so much at, as through. Finally, his voice cut through the silence.
“So, you are new to The Resistance, I see.”
I nodded.
“No scars yet? Don’t worry, son, you’ll have plenty before they dump you in a grave. Likely as not, it’ll be unmarked, and no one will weep.”
He leaned toward me, but his gaze was fixed on my soul still. “Would you like some advice? Who knows? It might keep you out of the grave for a little while.”
I nodded. I was in way over my head, and I knew it. What was I thinking when I decided to rebel? Or was I thinking? But here I was—cold, and lonely, and scared, wondering how long it would be before I was as old and beat up as this warrior. How old was he? I couldn’t tell.
“I’m only thirty-two,” he said, apparently reading what I had been thinking. What might have passed for a smile faded from his face before it could be positively identified. “Still, I was young not so long ago, like you. And I thought the war would be over by now. I know better now. I know now why they call this “The Long War”.
He sat back, and took a sip of his coffee, and grimaced. “Some fool has let my coffee get cold,” he said. He drank the rest of his coffee in two gulps, and sat the cup down on the table, none too gently.
“And now for the advice,” he said.
“The enemy don’t give a rip about fightin’ fair. The enemy don’t care whether it kills you by night or by day. And the enemy don’t sleep.
“You’ll be alone, and the enemy will stick a knife in your back, or you’ll be with your comrades, and the enemy will pick you out and pick you off.
“Nine times out of ten, you won’t even see the enemy, but rest assured, the enemy is still there.
“You could surrender, you know. You’ll want to do that a thousand times. But remember that the enemy takes no prisoners, except to torture and use for propaganda. And, of course, the enemy will kill you in the end, anyway.
“There will be times when you’ll think it would be best to end it all yourself, choose your own time, your own method. But then you’ll remember that there might be someone who loves you, and that you are part of the Resistance, and you’ll fight on, even when you don’t feel like it, even when you want to die.
“The enemy will turn your family against you, friends will desert you, and you’ll be called a terrorist by people who don’t even want to admit there’s a war. But there’s a war alright. And you’re a soldier now, and you are the battlefield. And remember one thing more.”
Here, he paused to make sure I was with him, and not merely thinking about how to escape from this basement, this man, this reality. When he was sure that I was captured, he said,
“And one thing more, you must never forget: You are also the enemy!”
He pushed his chair back from the table to get another cup of coffee.
I headed for the door, his words echoing, echoing.
“And you are also the enemy!”
“Also the enemy!”
“Also the enemy!”
I stumbled out the door to face the darkness, to face the enemy, to face my addiction.
“The Uncontainable God”
NAS 2 Chronicles 6:18 “But will God indeed dwell with mankind on the earth? Behold, heaven and the highest heaven cannot contain Thee; how much less this house which I have built.”
This is Solomon’s prayer of dedication at the completion of the temple in Jerusalem. God’s glory falls only after Solomon finishes his prayer, acknowledging that God cannot be contained in any building (2 Chronicles 7:1). In the somewhat parallel telling of story in 1 Kings 8, Solomon only mentions God’s uncontainableness after God’s glory has filled the temple (8:27). As with all profound truths, there are several ways in which the story should and indeed, must, be told in order to convey the truth.
But in both versions of the story, one truth is front and center: God is not containable. The most elaborate, ornate, expensive, well-built building in the world cannot contain the LORD God.
God is uncontainable. No space, no person, no collection of persons, no institution, no doctrine, no political party, can contain God. God is uncontainable. The technical, theological, Latin-based word for this aspect of God is “infinity.” God is infinite—i.e., God has no limits.
And yet, I am forever battling the urge to treat God as if God were nuclear waste. I am always trying to contain God.
Why? The answer is simple: I want to be God. The first step in being God is containing God.
But, of course, the True God is not containable. So . . .
I pretend that God is containable, and that I am God! See how simple it is!
O God—and no, I am not talking to myself—please deliver me from my attempts at containing you. Help me to live in the truth of your uncontainableness today. (According to my spell checker, “uncontainableness” is not a word. My spell checker doesn’t even have a suggestion as to what word would work here. I will add the word to the dictionary.)
There! The red line under the word has been removed. Oh, Uncontainable God, help me not simply to add the word “uncontainable” to my lexicon, but to add it also to the heart’s lexicon of daily obedience. Help me to live in the reality of your uncontainableness, and not only to live in that reality, but to be swept away by that reality.
“On Rooting for Cinderella”
So, it was a good World Series, wasn’t it? It was heart-breaking for the Indians and their fans. It was exhilarating to “the lovable losers” (a.k.a. “the Cubs”).
And me?
Well, I live in Ohio, but my team is not the Indians. (I won’t mention the name of “my” team, but I will tell you that their initials are “The Cincinnati Reds.”)
However, despite living in Ohio now, I lived in the Chicago area for three years, and fell in love with the Cubbies, a love that persists—except, of course, when they play the Reds.
Stir in another factor in order to bake this ambivalence pie: I like to root for whoever is down, whoever is the most “Cinderella-ish.” Going into the World Series, the team that was most like Cinderella was Cleveland.
However, after four games, the Indians were up three to one, and were heading back to Cleveland. “Well,” I said to myself, “my good friend John is from Cleveland, so it is okay if the Indians win.
And, if I were a betting man, then that is precisely the way I would have bet. However, there would be several more HUGE “howevers.”
HOWEVER, the Cubs won the next two games in Cleveland, and in a back-and-forth wrestling match between the two Cinderellas, the Cubs won game seven. It was one of the best baseball games I have never watched. (I went to bed when the Cubs were up three to one, thinking that Chi Town had the matter well in hand. Silly me! Judge me not! I was tired!)
Virtually everything makes me think of God, even cliff-hanger Cinderella baseball wrestling matches.
God loves Cinderellas! This is true in the Old Testament, where God chose Cinderellas such as Abram and Sarah, Hannah, Gideon, and David. Indeed, Israel itself wasn’t much to look at. (See Deuteronomy 7:1-8, for example. Of course, no nation is much to look at. Sometimes, we forget that.)
The New Testament is all about God’s very very HUGE “however.” Jesus showed great love for Cinderella teams and Cinderella individuals. Jesus’ actions as well as his teachings confirm this. According to Luke 14:15-24, the Cinderellas of the world are the ones who get invited to the ball. Others are too busy being busy (and too busy making excuses) to attend.
I had lunch recently with a good friend who feels like a Cinderella. He thinks of all that he could have accomplished if only he had made better decisions in his life. I know this man very well. He has been exceedingly frank about his struggles and failings. Still, he thinks of himself as a Cinderella.
And yet, I think of him as a very successful person. He has accomplished a lot of really good things, including loving me. And I am not the easiest person in the world to love!
I suspect that all of us feel like Cinderella. Some of us feel that way some of the time, some most of the time, and some all of the time. We are all waiting for a handsome prince (or princess) to come and place the right shoe on our foot.
Perhaps God has already put the slipper on our foot. Perhaps the slipper is called “Grace!” And God’s grace is the hugest “however” of them all.
DTEB
“On Making Oatmeal and a Mess”
So, I put oatmeal on the stove this morning. However, I realized that I had a little time before it cooked, so I went out to get the trash cans and recycling bin, and set them beside the garage.
Then I walked back in the house, and there was my server’s apron on the counter right beside the door. “Oh, I should go ahead and put this in my car,” I said to myself.
While I was in the garage, I decided to put my bike in the trunk, and . . . well, you can see where this is going, can’t you?
By the time I remembered the oatmeal, it was nice and creamy—or, at least, it was creamy on top. On the bottom of the saucepan was a substance that was roughly the color and consistency of tartar on teeth that have not been cleaned for five years.
Attention Deficit Disorder is such an interesting disease! Sometimes, I think it should be called A.E.D: “Attention Excess Disorder.” I try to pay attention to too much.
Some recent studies have suggested that “multitasking” is not really possible. I know it isn’t possible for me. I try to pack too much living into life, and end up with a saucepan that is not easy to clean.
I am a big fan of M*A*S*H reruns. I can’t say that I like Charles Emerson Winchester III (who is as pompous as his name suggests), but I do think he occasionally makes a good point. Early in his tenure at the 4077, Winchester said, “I do one thing, I do it very well, and then I move on.”
The Apostle Paul, a person who accomplished a lot, said something similar about his desire to know Christ. “Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14).
When you’re running a race, you don’t have more than one goal. What race are you running? Don’t try to do too many other things and let your oatmeal burn!
PETALS OF JOY
ON HAVING THROWING PETALS OF JOY THROWN AT US
“If you are saved, why hasn’t your face been informed?” (Source unknown.)
My wife and I were visiting family in Kentucky, a lively bunch of boys and one little girl who was obviously able to hold her own.
When we were about to leave for home, the two oldest boys (ages seven and five) began pulling petals off the likely last roses of summer, and throwing them on us. “We’re throwing petals of joy on you!” they exclaimed.
Their mom eventually put the kibosh on them, fortunately before there was no joy left on the rose bushes themselves.
The rose petals, now pretty well shriveled—but still pretty—are still lying on our dining room table. Memory is sometimes the loveliest form of joy. As long as my mind is alive, I will remember the gift of joy those boys gave to my wife and me.
Do you and I throw petals of joy at other people? Do we cherish the petals of joy that others throw at us? Why should little kids have all the fun?
The life of Christians is (or at least should be) characterized by joy. That is not to say that we Christians don’t have our share of grief and problems. We do. No human is exempt from grief and problems.
However, our default position should involve petals of joy? Why?
Well, for one thing, we are commanded to rejoice. Grumpiness is always an option for anyone, including believers in Christ. However, chronic grumpiness that is chosen is a not-so-subtle form of disobedience. “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!” So says Paul, who was a prisoner of Rome at the time of writing his letter to the Philippians. In fact, Paul says that he himself was rejoicing (Philippians 1:4, 25; 2:2,17f,29; 4:1; 1:18; 2:17f,28; 3:1; 4:4,10). Of course, if Paul has to say something—and even repeat himself—it is probably because at least some of the believers in Philippi were acting as if they had been baptized in vinegar.
The Old Testament also commands joy. Our worship leader read Psalm 96 this past Sunday. Even nature (all creation) is to rejoice in the LORD!
Then too, throwing petals of joy makes both the thrower and “throwee” happier.
Of course, there are people who enjoy misery. I used to often be one of those people myself. However, perhaps you could try making people like I used to be more miserable by throwing some joy their way. That way, you’ll be helping them, one way or the other.
However, one caution: Joy is the fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22). In fact it is the second aspect kind of the nine-fold fruit, mentioned right after love and right before peace. Joy is nestled between love and peace, and if we are pursuing love and peace, then joy will be right at home in our hearts, our lives, and our relationships.
Be on the lookout for petals of joy today. Be on the lookout, too, for opportunities to throw some petals at others.
DOWN TO EARTH BELIEVER
- “Even a Sliver of Light” April 9, 2024“For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.” (2 Corinthians 5:6, English Standard Version) I missed the total eclipse yesterday. There were a number of good reasons for this, but […]
- “The Process in Miracles and the Miracle of Process” March 11, 2024“2 Kings 5:1 Naaman, commander of the army of the king of Syria, was a great man with his master and in high favor, because by him the LORD had given victory to Syria. He was a mighty man of valor, but he was a leper. 2 Now the Syrians on one of their raids […]
- “The Power of Encouragement—Even for Old People” March 10, 2024“But encourage each other every day while it is ‘today.’ Help each other so none of you will become hardened because sin has tricked you.” (Hebrews 3:13, New Century Version) Yesterday, I was walking at a nearby park. There was a large group of young people some of whom were running while other young people […]
- “Endurance” March 10, 2024“For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.” (Hebrews 10:36, English Standard Version) “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us […]
- “The Limits of Non-Judgmentalism” February 24, 2024“Matt. 7:1 “Judge not, that you be not judged. Matt. 7:2 For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.” (Matthew 7:1-2, English Standard Version) This morning, in my virtual 12-step meeting, we discussed the topic of judgmentalism. There were many wise […]
- “Delighting in Being Told What to Do?!?” February 23, 2024“Psa. 112:1 Praise the LORD! Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, who greatly delights in his commandments! 2 His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. 3 Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures […]
- “Character is the Real Lesson” January 19, 2024I am often confused about what lesson I’m really supposed to be learning. For example, this morning I was trying to knock out several Spanish lessons. My intentions were a lot better than my internet connection. I’ve done three lessons. Or rather, I’ve done two lessons. One of them I did twice because the internet […]
- “The Year of Becoming Un-Planked” January 1, 2024Each year, I try to come up with one word or a short phrase for what I intend to work on in the upcoming year. 2024 is “The Year of Becoming Un-Planked”. What?!! What does that even mean? So glad that you asked! Jesus said to his disciples, “Why do you look at the speck […]
- “Searching for the Noble One” December 26, 2023My wife and I were reading Luke, chapter 2 on Christmas Day. Luke 2 talks about the shepherds being told to look for this very special child—in fact, this King—in a stable. I prefer the word “barn”. I grew up on a farm. I know what a barn is. A stable is entirely too biblical […]
- “That Don’t Impress God Much” December 14, 2023DTEB, “That Don’t Impress God Much” “That Don’t Impress Me Much” (Song by Robert John Lange and Shania Twain) Micah 6:8 (MSG) “But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be […]
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